Stewie Griffin Does Death Battles: Season 2
by GiovanniGo
Summary: Wiz and Boomstick are back for Season 2 of "Death Battles". This second season shall have more action, more violence, and more opponents than Season 1 did. Stewie Griffin shall fight them all to see who will live and who will die. Who will it be? Just read to find out! Rated M for foul language, violence, and blood. If you're a very young reader, reader discretion is advised.
1. Stewie Griffin VS Jessie and James

**Well everyone, here I am, alive and well once again. Season 2 of "Death Battle" is about to begin! Yep, Wiz and Boomstick are back, bringing you all more battles, each one better than the next. Stewie Griffin shall return and fight more opponents, both good and evil. To kick of Season 2, Stevie Griffin shall travel to the far east, and fight off not one, but TWO opponents. Who are these two opponents? Will they win? Well, you'll just have to read and find out for yourself. Well, what are we waiting for? Let's begin chapter 1 of the second season of this epic miniseries...**

Wiz: Well everyone, welcome to Season 2 of "Death Battle". And do we have a Season 2 premiere battle for you!

Boomstick: Stewie Griffin, everyone's favorite homicidal baby…

Wiz: And Jessie and James, the team members of "Team Rocket", and the main enemies of "Pokemon".

Boomstick: He's Wiz, and I'm Boomstick!

Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win, a Death Battle!

 **Introduction to Stewie Griffin:**

Boomstick: Ah, good old Stewie Griffin. You never know what'll happen when messing with this kid! Needless to say, he's very happy to be fighting again in this second.

Wiz: We already introduced Stewie Griffin in the last season of "Death Battle", but we still have to do it again due to the rules of "Death Battle".

Boomstick: To make it short and sweet on my part, Stewie Griffin is a homicidal baby that wants complete world domination!

Wiz: This one-year-old is not meant to be messed with. If you do mess with him, he'll probably kill you. Not joking, he WILL kill you if provoked.

Boomstick: Stewie Griffin is the youngest member of the Griffin family, but don't yet his young appearance fool you. He's a damn psychopath!

Wiz: Born on June 30 1999, Stewie Griffin has a very sophisticated psyche and is able to speak fluently in an upper-class English accent. When he was born, his birth doctor found a map of Europe with plans to bomb its capitals inside Lois, his mother.

Boomstick: From that day on, he was shown not to be a normal kid, but a kid with the mind of a criminal. His weapon arsenal is full of classic weapons. These weapons include a machine gun, a tommy gun, a chainsaw, a machete, a flame thrower, a rocket launcher, a crossbow, a laser gun, a few hand grenades, a handgun, and even a harpoon gun. This is one of the reasons you should think twice about messing with Stewie!

Wiz: Not to mention his abilities! He can run fast, jump high, trick his enemies, punch hard, kick hard, and even bite hard. He can yell or curse up a storm, and he can even invent things.

Boomstick: Over the years of the "Family Guy" show, Stewie has invented many futuristic inventions, such as a mind controlling device, a carbonite freeze gun, a hypnotic control device, a hovering drill machine, a teleporter device, a multiverse traveler, a Peter-Bot, a clone machine, rocket skis, a weather device, and even a God-damn time machine! Wow, this is one badass little kid.

Wiz: His inventions are very cool and technologically advanced, and he uses them multiple times. However, due to the rules of "Death Battle", Stewie can't use his time machine. But he can use any of his other inventions.

Boomstick: This all proves one thing…if you want to bully a kid, please make sure that kid is not Stewie.

Wiz: However, he's not PERFECT. When his friend Brian gets into a dangerous situation, its been shown since Stewie and Brain are friends, Stewie CAN get distracted from any of his battles to help save Brian.

Boomstick: Wait, what?! Why on Earth does he care so much at Brian?

Wiz: Well, in one episode, he mentions that because of neglect from Peter, his father, he sees Brain as a fatherly figure, more than Peter. So, because of this, Stewie can get emotional and weak sometimes.

Boomstick: But despite this, Stewie Griffin is still one badass kid!

 **Introduction to Jessie and James:**

Boomstick: When Season 2 of "Death Battles" came into development, we really wanted to kick it off on a high note. And what better way to do that than by having him take on TWO opponents instead of one!

Wiz: Jessie and James are a duo of villains who are obsessed with trying to steal Ash's Pokemon. They're both full of athletic skills, and villainy skills alike. They can run fast, snatch Poke-Balls, jump very well, dodge projectiles, and even fight back very well with their own Pokemon. However, due to the rules of "Death Battle", Jessie and James cannot use their Pokemon in the battle.

Boomstick: This duo is not meant to be messed with, as their physical skills can ultimately defeat you. They can also use their Pokemon and physically attack you at the same time. And they also have their Pokemon pet/sidekick, Meowth to probably attack you. But he can't help them out during the battle due to the rules of "Death Battle". But they can use their physical skills to do so.

Wiz: Well, what on Earth are we all waiting for? Let's begin this brand new "Death Battle" and officially kick off Season 2! Here we go…

 **And now, the actual battle to the death…**

 _(The scene begins with Stewie Griffin in the living room, watching an episode of "Pokemon". The episode then finishes, and Stewie leaves the living room, and walks up to Brian in the kitchen…)_

Brian: Hey Stewie, what's up?

Stewie: Fine. Brian, can we go to Japan?

Brian (looks up from book he's reading): Japan? Stewie, are you kidding me?

Stewie: Yes! "Pokemon" takes place in Japan, so now, I want to go to Japan for real!

Brian: Uh, no way. No Stewie, not happening.

Stewie: Oh, come on! Take me to Japan!

Brian: No Stewie, we're not going to Japan. First of all, it's too expensive, and second of all, the flight is over 23 hours long. Sorry Stewie, no way. We're not going to Japan.

Stewie: BUT I REALLY WANT TO GO! TAKE ME! TAKE ME! TAKE ME TO JAPAN!

Brian: Stewie, stop screaming. Staying mad at me isn't going to change my answer.

Stewie (stomps foot): FINE! In that case, I'll go build a private jet and fly to Japan myself!

Brian (laughs): Stewie, you can't do that. (focuses back on book) But if you want to try to do so, have at it.

Stewie (turns away): Fine, I will (walks to his room)

 _(Cuts to the backyard 3 hours later. Stewie's private jet is all fueled up, stocked with supplies, and is ready to flight. Stewie backs up his suitcase, grabs his 60 dollars, and boards the plane. He then closes the front door and locks it up. He then gets into the cockpit, locks the door, and sits down in the pilot's chair, buckling up. He then turns the ignition key, starting up the engines. Stewie finally takes off into the sky, reach's its cruising altitude of 35,000 feet, and pushes a button labeled, "Supersonic Speed"…)_

Stewie (grins): There, that ought to make it extra-fast flying speed. I'll be in Japan in only 5 hours. (sets plane on "Autopilot) Well, I'm going to go and make my airline meal. (exits cockpit)

 _(Cuts to 5 hours later over the country of Japan. Suddenly, a red light begins to flash and an alarm goes off in the background…)_

Stewie (sees light): What the? (sees empty fuel gauge) Oh, crap! I'm running out of gas! (switches off "Autopilot") I better try to land right away! (turns on communication radio) MAYDAY! MAYDAY! I NEED HELP! I NEED TO MAKE AN EMERGENCY LANDING!

Communication radio: (nothing but static noises)

Stewie (turns it off): Crap, no replies. (puts hands on steering wheel as plane make's its descent) I better land this thing myself than! (pushes wheel forward)

 _(Cuts to plane crash landing in the outskirts of Tokyo, Japan, somewhere in the Katon region. The plane lands in the middle of a shallow lake. Stewie breaks open window, grabs his book bag, and jumps out of the plane. He then runs through the shallow lake and gets on the land…)_

Stewie: Oh man, I really screwed up this time! (puts book bag over his shoulders) I better try to find a place to stay (walks off towards a Japanese garden)

 _(Scene cuts to Jessie and James sitting together on a nearby bench, going over a written plan to steal several Pokemon species from a nearby Pokemon clinic…)_

Jamie: So, once the safe is cracked open, all unused Pokemon shall be ours!

Jessie (laughs): Oh, this is such a great plan!

Stewie (walks up to Jessie and James): Hello there, folks. Uh, would you happen to know where the nearest hotel is?

Jessie (looks up from plan): Uh, say that again please.

James: James, he needs to find a hotel.

Jessie: Oh, well, silly me. Well, there IS a hotel about 10 miles away.

Stewie: 10 MILES!? Are you serious!?

Jessie: Well, too bad, brat. It's all there is around here.

Stewie: HOW DARE YOU CALL ME A BRAT!? (pulls out shotgun)

James: OH CRAP! (stands up in fear)

Jessie: James, don't be a coward! (stands up and looks at Stewie) Bring it on, bratty!

James: You're going to pay for pulling out that gun on us!

Jessie: Prepare for trouble!

James: Make it double!

Jessie: To protect the world from deviation...

James: To unite all peoples within our nation!

Jessie: To denounce the evils of truth and love...

James: To extend our reach to the stars above!

Jessie: Jessie...

James: James...

Jessie: Team Rocket blasts off in the speed of light!

James: Surrender now, or prepare to fight!

Stewie (grins): Oh, you bet I'm ready to fight...

 **FIGHT!**

Stewie (fires machine gun): TAKE THIS!

Jessie and James (dodge bullets): NEVER MESS WITH "TEAM ROCKET"! (kick Stewie to the ground)

Stewie (gets up): Big mistake, you duo of feces! (pulls out flamethrower) TIME FOR FIRE! (fires flamethrower)

Jessie and James (catch on fire): AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH! (run off) HELP! AAAAHHHH!

Stewie (chases after them): GET BACK HERE!

Jessie and James (grab nearby fire extinguisher): Is it just us, or is it getting COLDER here?! (fires the fire extinguisher)

Stewie (drops flamethrower): HEY! (frowns) That's it! No more Mr. Nice Baby! (sees one of James's Poke-Balls) Destroy MY property?! (snatches Poke-Ball) NOW, YOU CAN'T HAVE THIS! (runs off, steals nearby bicycle) HAHA! YOU CAN'T CATCH ME!

Jessie and James (chases after Stewie): GET BACK HERE, YOU BRATTY BABY!

James: That's my Poke-Ball!

Stewie (turns around to look at James): NOT ANYMORE! (laughs, looks forward again)

 _(Scene shows Stewie speeding into the Downtown area of the city of Tokyo, Japan, dodging cars, trucks, buses, etc. Stewie sees stairway leading to subway tunnel and speeds down the stairs, nearly hitting Ash on the way down…)_

Ash (falls over on the left of stairs): OW! HEY! (gets up) Watch where you're going!

Stewie (jumps off bike and jumps over turnstiles): Oh, shut up! This doesn't concern you! (sees subway train pulling up into the station) Perfect! Right on time! (runs onto train)

 _(Scene then shows Jessie and James running into the subway station, jumping over the turnstiles, trying to catch Stewie on the train. But the doors close right before they can reach it. The train then sped out of the station…)_

Jessie: Drat, we'll never catch with him now!

James: Don't worry. I got an idea…(sees nearby motorcycle)

 _(Scene cuts to Jessie and James, riding the stolen motorcycle through the subway tunnel, getting closer and closer to the speeding train. Stewie is in the first car of the subway station, and he sees Jessie and James getting closer…)_

Stewie: Oh, crap! They're gaining on me! I better get this train to speed up. (sees door to the driver's/control room at the very front of the train car) Hmmm…(grins) I got an idea! (runs up to control room door, pulls out handgun, shoots lock off, and swings open door)

Train driver: What the heck? What are you doing in here?

Stewie (jumps on dashboard): Shut up, old guy. (points handgun at driver) Now, I'm taking over this train! Get out or else!

Train driver: Or else what?

Stewie: Or else…THIS! (shoots the driver in chest, killing him instantly) Good, now to speed up this train! (closes control room door) Alright, which control here controls the speed? (finds throttle lever) Ah, here I go…(pulls lever back, increasing speed)

 _(The train speed up very fast, causing all of the passengers onboard to fall over, hit the walls, get injured, etc. Jessie and James notice the train's speed increase…)_

Jessie: Crap, the train is getting faster! (pushes pedal harder) It must be the brat that took over the train or something!

James (laughs): Jessie, that's ridiculous! How on Earth could a child do that? (suddenly sees Stewie in the window of the driver's room of the train) HE DID! OH MY GOSH!

Jessie: James, I got an idea! Climb on my back and I'll get us closer to the train. When I say to, jump off and break open the window. Then, stop the train, and that kid will be dead!

James (gets onto Jessie's back): Okay, I'm ready for your signal!

Jessie (gets closer to the front of the train): NOW!

James (jumps off Jessie's back and grabs onto side of train) I DID IT! (grins at Stewie in the widow) HERE'S JAMES! (punches hole in glass and reaches for throttle lever)

Stewie (pulls out machine gun): Oh now, you don't! (fires machine at James, killing him, and causing his body to fall onto the ground)

Jessie (sees James's death): NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! JAMES, I'LL AVENGE YOU! (jumps off motorcycle, grabs onto side of train, kicks bigger hole in window, and jumps into train) BRAT, TIME TO DIE FOR WHAT YOU DID TO JAMES!

Stewie (grins): Oh yeah? (pulls out katana) Not unless I kill you first! (swings katana very hard at Jessie's head, cutting it off her body, killing her instantly) HEADS UP! (laughs)

 _(Stewie sees subway station coming up on the left, and pulls the brake. The train stops so suddenly, that it derails, and 4 cars of the train tipped over on the left, crashing into the station platform. The other cars of the train tipped over and fell on the ground on the right. Dozens of bystanders panic in fear and shock, and rush over to the aid of the passengers inside the train. Some of them call emergency services and soon, dozens of police officers, firemen, and paramedics arrive at the station to help the passengers inside the train get out. Stewie sneaks out the front window and runs off, exiting the subway station, and not being seen by anyone…)_

Stewie (takes Poke-ball out of his pocket): Well, since that fight is over, it looks like I won't be needing this anymore…(tosses Poke-Ball into nearby trashcan) Well, time to go find a hotel…(walks away)

 **KO!**

Boomstick: Now that's what I call a good way to start off Season 2! Man, that was awesome! Can we do that so a subway train one day?

Wiz (sighs): No, Boomstick. Anyways, as you can see, both Jessie and James did a very good job at chasing Stewie and hurting him at the beginning, but Stewie's tactical and lethal methods of fight game him a clear advantage here.

Boomstick: And also, Jessie and James have been doing evil schemes all their life, but usually get defeated by Ash and his friends. It looks like Meowth will have to find a new owner to be raised by. Thanks to Stewie, Jessie and James are now in a better place.

Wiz: The winner is Stewie Griffin.

Boomstick: Thanks for watching and we'll see you all next time on "Death Battle"!

 **THE END!**

 **Well, how was the first episode of Season 2? Was it epic? Was it worth the wait? Well, I hope you all liked it. Stewie Griffin really showed off some stunts this time, when he took over the train and all. Oh, I bet you weren't expecting it all. No, no you were not. Well, its time to move on. In the next chapter, Stewie Griffin shall fight ANOTHER opponent. Who is the next opponent? Well, you'll just have to read and find out for yourself. Well, what are we all waiting for? Let's move on to chapter 2 of this very epic miniseries...**


	2. Stewie Griffin VS Meowth

**Well everyone, I'm back. Yep, I'm back with chapter 2 of the second season of this very epic miniseries. In the last chapter, Stewie Griffin battled Jessie and James of "Team Rocket" from "Pokémon" and he won again, starting the series off on a good note. Now, in this chapter, Stewie Griffin shall face off against Jessie and James's Pokémon companion, Meowth. Who will win this battle to the death? What will happen during the battle? Well, you'll just have to read and find out for yourself. Well, what on Earth are we waiting for? Let's all begin chapter 2 of this very epic and action-packed miniseries...**

Wiz: Hey everyone, it's time for another battle to the death for Season 2! And this opponent wants revenge!

Boomstick: Stewie Griffin, everyone's favorite homicidal baby…

Wiz: And Meowth, the evil Pokemon species who wants revenege for his dead owners.

Boomstick: He's Wiz, and I'm Boomstick!

Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win, a Death Battle!

 **Introduction to Stewie Griffin:**

Boomstick: Ah, good old Stewie Griffin. You never know what'll happen when messing with this kid! Needless to say, he's very happy to be fighting again in this second.

Wiz: We already introduced Stewie Griffin in the last season of "Death Battle", but we still have to do it again due to the rules of "Death Battle".

Boomstick: To make it short and sweet on my part, Stewie Griffin is a homicidal baby that wants complete world domination!

Wiz: This one-year-old is not meant to be messed with. If you do mess with him, he'll probably kill you. Not joking, he WILL kill you if provoked.

Boomstick: Stewie Griffin is the youngest member of the Griffin family, but don't yet his young appearance fool you. He's a damn psychopath!

Wiz: Born on June 30 1999, Stewie Griffin has a very sophisticated psyche and is able to speak fluently in an upper-class English accent. When he was born, his birth doctor found a map of Europe with plans to bomb its capitals inside Lois, his mother.

Boomstick: From that day on, he was shown not to be a normal kid, but a kid with the mind of a criminal. His weapon arsenal is full of classic weapons. These weapons include a machine gun, a tommy gun, a chainsaw, a machete, a flame thrower, a rocket launcher, a crossbow, a laser gun, a few hand grenades, a handgun, and even a harpoon gun. This is one of the reasons you should think twice about messing with Stewie!

Wiz: Not to mention his abilities! He can run fast, jump high, trick his enemies, punch hard, kick hard, and even bite hard. He can yell or curse up a storm, and he can even invent things.

Boomstick: Over the years of the "Family Guy" show, Stewie has invented many futuristic inventions, such as a mind controlling device, a carbonite freeze gun, a hypnotic control device, a hovering drill machine, a teleporter device, a multiverse traveler, a Peter-Bot, a clone machine, rocket skis, a weather device, and even a God-damn time machine! Wow, this is one badass little kid.

Wiz: His inventions are very cool and technologically advanced, and he uses them multiple times. However, due to the rules of "Death Battle", Stewie can't use his time machine. But he can use any of his other inventions.

Boomstick: This all proves one thing…if you want to bully a kid, please make sure that kid is not Stewie.

Wiz: However, he's not PERFECT. When his friend Brian gets into a dangerous situation, its been shown since Stewie and Brain are friends, Stewie CAN get distracted from any of his battles to help save Brian.

Boomstick: Wait, what?! Why on Earth does he care so much at Brian?

Wiz: Well, in one episode, he mentions that because of neglect from Peter, his father, he sees Brain as a fatherly figure, more than Peter. So, because of this, Stewie can get emotional and weak sometimes.

Boomstick: But despite this, Stewie Griffin is still one badass kid!

 **Introduction to Meowth:**

Boomstick: Ah, cats. They're so cute and adorable. But not this cat! Meowth isn't even a cat, he's a Pokemon species, and not a very nice guy he is.

Wiz: But everyone has a backstory. He originally lived in the city, and tried to impress a female Meowth named Meowzie by learning to walk on two legs and speak human language. Instead of being impressed, she regarded him as a freak, so Meowth joined Team Rocket.

Boomstick: He's been a partner of Jessie and James ever since. As well as being a team member, he has a great array of skills. He can jump very high, run very fast, dodge projectiles and even throw heavy objects at others.

Wiz: No, he can't throw trees like Muscle Man in Season 1, but he can throw smaller objects like trash cans, bicycles, car tires, and even small logs.

Boomstick: And he also can bite other Pokémon, as well as use Fury Swipe on them, kick them hard, punch them hard, and even use a doubled ability known as Double Fury Swipe.

Wiz: And not only does he speak English, but he can also understand other Pokémon, as well as communicate with them.

Boomstick: Oh boy, this is one bad kitty. And he wants revenge on Stewie now! Let's see what will happen on this episode of "Death Battle".

 **And now, the actual battle to the death…**

 _(The scene begins with_ _Stewie Griffin exiting the lobby of a nearby hotel in the center of Tokyo, Japan after checking in…)_

Stewie: Well, I'm all checked in and I'm ready to explore Japan. (walks down sidewalk)

 _(Behind him, Meowth peeks out from a garbage can nearby, spying on Stewie…)_

Meowth: So, he's my owners' killers! Well, he's going to pay the price for what he did to me! (jumps out of trashcan and walks up to Stewie) Hey you! (taps on Stewie's shoulders)

Stewie (turns around): Yes?

Meowth: Are you the kid who hijacked the subway train?

Stewie (sweats): Uh…no…

Meowth: Really? Oh, that's funny. Because I was on that train this morning and I saw you HIJACK THE TRAIN AND KILL MY OWNERS!

Stewie (backs away): Y-y-your owners?

Meowth: YES! Jessie and James were my teammates and owners! But today, you had to come along, and kill them off!

Stewie (grins): Yes, I did indeed kill them off. So what?

Meowth (shows claws): I'M GOING TO GET MY REVENGE!

Stewie: Oh yeah? (pulls out machine gun) Bring it on, kitty!

Meowth: THE NAME IS MEOWTH!

 **FIGHT!**

Stewie (fires machine gun): Here, have some lead!

Meowth (dodges bullets): Haha! You missed me!

Stewie (runs out of bullets): So, I did! (pulls out shotgun) But now, I got EXTRA LEAD! (fires shotgun)

Meowth (slashes claws at Stewie, cutting his left side of his stomach)

Stewie (drops machine gun and clutches left side of stomach): AAAAAHHHHH! (falls over) Dude, that hurts!

Meowth (grabs nearby trashcan and raises it over his head): Prepare to suffer! (evil grin) NO ONE KILLS MY OWNERS! (tosses it at Stewie)

Stewie (gets up and pulls out laser gun): NOT TODAY! (slices trashcan in half with laser, causing both pieces to roll away)

Meowth: CHEATER!

Stewie (pulls out machete): Well duh, I'm a homicidal baby. Of course I'm going to cheat! (slices Meowth's tail off)

Meowth: OW! (grabs back of lower body in pain) MY TAIL!

Stewie: HAHA! Now, the kitty was no tail!

Meowth: That makes me REALLY MAD! (runs toward Stewie)

Stewie (laughs): Catch me if you can! (runs off)

Meowth: Get back here! (chases after Stewie)

Stewie (steals nearby bike and speeds toward the Tokyo Tower): I need a plan to kill that thing! (sees tower) Hmmm, I have an idea. (speeds towards the tower, going past multiple cars and pedestrians) Almost there…(stops in front of base of tower)

Meowth (jumps on top of multiple cars, trucks, and buses, going after Stewie): You can't escape me!

Stewie (shoots grappling hook gun and hooks the antenna at the top of the base): Perfect! GOING UP! (rushes up the side of the tower) HEY KITTY, I BET YOU CAN'T CLIMB UP HERE TO GET ME!

Meowth: Oh yeah!? (rushes up the side of the tower): I'm almost there!

Stewie (ties rope around his waist): Oh yeah?! (folds up fists) Try to fight me, you little piece of shit! (begins punching Meowth as he approaches him)

Meowth: OW! OW! STOP IT! OUCH! AAAWWW! HELP! STOP IT, PLEASE!

Stewie (keeps punching Meowth): NEVER!

Meowth (gets out claws again): TIME TO PAY! (Slashes Stewie, cutting his left arm)

Stewie (slams against tower structure): OW! (grabs left arm in pain) No one cuts my arm! (climbs up side of tower some more, reaching the antenna) THAT'S IT! No more Mr. Nice Guy! (pulls out harpoon gun) TIME TO DIE! (fires harpoon gun)

Meowth (dodges and rushes up the side of the tower): MISSED ME! (grabs Stewie and pins him against the antenna) Now, its time to finish you off and make you pay the price for what you did to my owners!

Stewie (shivers): Fine! But can I have a last word please?

Meowth: Yes…what is this last word?

Stewie: My last word…is…THIS! (suddenly pulls out axe)

Meowth: What the!?

Stewie (swings axe at Meowth, cutting his head and limps off, killing him instantly) YES! HE'S DEAD! No one messes with Stewie Griffin! (unhooks grappling hook and climbs back down to the sidewalk) Sorry kitty, but you had it coming. (disposes of Meowth's chopped-up body into a dumpster and continues exploring the city of Tokyo Japan)

 **KO!**

Boomstick: Well, that battle was pretty…short. Well, it looks like the little kitty isn't going home today.

Wiz: As you can see, Meowth might've been skilled in combat, but Stewie's 100% winning reputation gave him the bigger advantage here. And also, Meowth has been outsmarted many times before, and also has been captured and nearly killed a couple of times in the past. The only reason he lived through those times in the past was because he was rescued by Jessie, James, or other Pokemon creatures at the last minute.

Boomstick: Stewie wasn't playing around in this battle to the death. And now, "Team Rocket" is officially gone for good. It looks like Ash and his friends are enemy-free forever, all thanks to Stewie, but let's hope they never encounter the homicidal baby.

Wiz: Once again, the winner is Stewie Griffin.

Boomstick: Thanks for watching and we'll see you all next time on "Death Battle"!

Wiz: This is Wiz and he's Boomstick, signing off…

 **THE END!**

 **Well, that's all for this chapter. It looks like Stewie won again and now Meowth is dead. Sorry if this "Death Battle" seems shorter than the others, but it's all I could come up with at the moment. The next one will be even longer and better than this one, I promise. In the next chapter, Stewie shall be back home in the U.S.A, only to face off against ANOTHER opponent. Who is this next opponent? Well, you'll just have to read and find out for yourself. I'm not going to spoil it all for you now. Well, what are we waiting for? Let's all move on to chapter 3 of this very epic and action-packed miniseries...**


	3. Stewie Griffin VS Father

**Hello everyone, I'm back! Yep, I'm back once again with another chapter of this very epic miniseries. In the last chapter, Stewie Griffin fought Meowth of "Team Rocket" and won. In this chapter, Stewie Griffin shall fight his most evilest opponent yet...Father from "Codename: Kids Next Door". How will the whole battle go? Who will win this epic battle to the death? Well, you'll just have to read and find out for yourself. I'm not going to spoil it all for you now. Well, what are we waiting for? Let's begin chapter 3 of this very epic miniseries...**

Wiz: They both are very evil, have an array of skills and abilities, and they both want to kill each other.

Boomstick: Stewie Griffin, everyone's favorite homicidal baby…

Wiz: And Father, the owner of "Evil Adult Industries".

Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick!

Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win, a Death Battle!

Introduction to Stewie Griffin:

Boomstick: Ah, good old Stewie Griffin. You never know what'll happen when messing with this kid! Needless to say, he LOVES fighting in these "Death Battles" and this is thirteenth battle to the death…

Wiz: We already introduced Stewie Griffin in the last season of "Death Battle", but we still have to do it again due to the rules of "Death Battle".

Boomstick: To make it short and sweet on my part, Stewie Griffin is a homicidal baby that wants complete world domination!

Wiz: This one-year-old is not meant to be messed with. If you do mess with him, he'll probably kill you. Not joking, he WILL kill you if provoked.

Boomstick: Stewie Griffin is the youngest member of the Griffin family, but don't yet his young appearance fool you. He's a damn psychopath!

Wiz: Born on June 30 1999, Stewie Griffin has a very sophisticated psyche and is able to speak fluently in an upper-class English accent. When he was born, his birth doctor found a map of Europe with plans to bomb its capitals inside Lois, his mother.

Boomstick: From that day on, he was shown not to be a normal kid, but a kid with the mind of a criminal. His weapon arsenal is full of classic weapons. These weapons include a machine gun, a tommy gun, a chainsaw, a machete, a flame thrower, a rocket launcher, a crossbow, a laser gun, a few hand grenades, a handgun, and even a harpoon gun. This is one of the reasons you should think twice about messing with Stewie!

Wiz: Not to mention his abilities! He can run fast, jump high, trick his enemies, punch hard, kick hard, and even bite hard. He can yell or curse up a storm, and he can even invent things.

Boomstick: Over the years of the "Family Guy" show, Stewie has invented many futuristic inventions, such as a mind controlling device, a carbonite freeze gun, a hypnotic control device, a hovering drill machine, a teleporter device, a multiverse traveler, a Peter-Bot, a clone machine, rocket skis, a weather device, and even a God-damn time machine! Wow, this is one badass little kid.

Wiz: His inventions are very cool and technologically advanced, and he uses them multiple times. However, due to the rules of "Death Battle", Stewie can't use his time machine. But he can use any of his other inventions.

Boomstick: This all proves one thing…if you want to bully a kid, please make sure that kid is not Stewie.

Wiz: However, he's not PERFECT. When his friend Brian gets into a dangerous situation, its been shown since Stewie and Brain are friends, Stewie CAN get distracted from any of his battles to help save Brian.

Boomstick: Wait, what?! Why on Earth does he care so much at Brian?

Wiz: Well, in one episode, he mentions that because of neglect from Peter, his father, he sees Brain as a fatherly figure, more than Peter. So, because of this, Stewie can get emotional and weak sometimes.

Boomstick: But despite this, Stewie Griffin is still one badass kid!

 **Introduction to Father:**

Boomstick: Ah, fathers. They're all really important to your life. They take you out for ice cream, take you to sporting events, they always look out for you, teach you how to shave, take you camping and fishing. and attend every important moments in your life. But not this father…

Wiz: Father is the main antagonist of "Codename: Kids Next Door". His ultimate goal is to destroy the Kids Next Door so that adults can rule the world unopposed.

Boomstick: But you can't have a villain without a backstory. And boy, do we have a backstory for you!

Wiz: As a child in Great Britain, Benedict Uno was terrified of his own father, being extremely obedient despite his dislike for the man. When Monty Uno decided to rebel against Grandfather, Benedict insisted that they would stand no chance against him, and, as a result of his cowardice, he did not join Monty in the uprising, which ultimately did prove successful.

Boomstick: Sometime between this incident and the present day of the series, Benedict took up his father's mantle as the king of evil and ultimate oppressor of children, became a demonic being similar to Grandfather, and vowed to destroy the Kids Next Door. He also moved to the United States.

Wiz: At one point, Father created the Delightfulization Chamber, a device designed to turn any kid into a mindlessly obedient and perfectly behaved child (most likely as a precaution for what happened between Monty and Grandfather, from happening to him). The first working Delightfulization Chamber was used on Sector Z. During the Delightfulization Process, the machine blew a fuse for reasons unknown, caused it to explode, and amplified its effects "eleventy billion-fold", which created the Delightful Children From Down The Lane, who from then on, would be Father's "children" and most powerful allies.

Boomstick: Other notable minions of Father include the Ice Cream Men, Six-Gum Gang and the Teen Ninjas, including his apprentice, Cree Lincoln and his captain, Chad Dickson. Father does not directly control the majority of the KND's rogues gallery, but frequently employs the services of other villains who, while otherwise operating independently, are readily willing to serve him.

Wiz: Even the Delightful Children frequently appear without Father. Father is occasionally seen attending the villain meetings of Mr. Boss, who regularly functions as a leader of the series' lesser villains or as a second-in-command. In "Operation: C.A.K.E.D.-F.O.U.R." and the comic story "Operation: H.I.S.T.O.R.I.E.", Father is said to be the head of a company called "Evil Adult Industries Inc."

Boomstick: It is also implied that Father employs several children similar to the DCFDTL throughout the world, as shown in the Interesting Twins From Beneath the Mountain and Rowdy Hooligans From Across the Square.

Wiz: Father was first encountered by Sector V in "Operation: G.R.O.W.-U.P.", in which he admonishes the DCFDTL for their repeated failures against the KND. He allows his children to use the "Really Really Incredibly Destructive Machine" to destroy the Sector V Treehouse; in the process, the Delightful Children also manage to transform Numbuh 1 into an adult with the Age Cigar. The remaining members of Sector V infiltrate the Delightful Mansion From Down The Lane to retrieve the cigar, with Numbuh 1 (now "Mr. Uno" the ice cream man) joining them to defeat the Delightful Children.

Boomstick: Sarcastically applauding Uno's success at defeating "a bunch of little kids", Father attacked with his devastating fire powers, but Sector V was able to triumph by covering him with all the ice cream in Mr. Uno's truck. As Numbuh 1 de-aged himself back to his old self and escaped with his team, Father could only lie on the floor, weakly ordering the DCFDTL to get his sweater.

Wiz: Okay, I think that's enough of Father's backstory. Let's talk about his physical appearance his skills, and his abilities. Father is slim and sharp. When his head is turned, he is shown to have a pointed chin, and a pointed nose. His hair is always styled into a pompadour, and he is never seen without his pipe (except for in "Operation: I.N.T.E.R.V.I.E.W.S.")

Boomstick: Father's body is completely black with a red outline along his body and eyebrows, giving him a silhouette-like appearance with few other discernible features, the most notable among them being his bright yellow eyes, which often are exaggerated since his eyes are the only way of visually seeing his facial expression. His mouth is rarely ever visible.

Wiz: Okay, that's enough of Father's physical appearance. Now, let's talk about his skills and abilities. Father possesses several superpowers, most notably an array of fire-based abilities such as shooting fireballs and creating a wall of flame around himself. His offensive powers tend to become more active when he is angered, and could even overpower the likes of his own father if enraged enough (though he has never tried).

Boomstick: In addition, Father possesses levitation (seen in "Operation: C.A.K.E.D.-F.I.V.E.", "Operation: G.R.A.D.U.A.T.E.S.", and other episodes), telekinesis (seen in "Operation: C.A.K.E.D.-F.I.V.E."), self-replicating (seen in "Operation: I.T."), and even shape-shifting (seen in "Operation: T.R.A.I.N.I.N.G.", "Operation: G.R.A.D.U.A.T.E.S. and Operation: I.N.T.E.R.V.I.E.W.S."). Man, this guy is unstoppable. Stewie is going to get KILLED by this man!

Wiz: Well Boomstick, he's not PERFECT. He does have a few minor weaknesses. He's shown to be weak to cold things such as ice cream, and water. He also, like children, hates broccoli, and was once defeated after being threatened with it.

Boomstick: Broccoli!? Ice cream?! Water!? Are you serious!? He has SUPPERNATURAL POWERS, and those tiny things are his WEANKESSES?

Wiz: Yes Boomstick, those minor things are his weaknesses. (sighs) But despite that, Father is still an unstoppable villain that Stewie is about to fight. Let's see how this battle to the death goes…

 **And now, the actual battle to the death…**

 _(Scene starts 2 days later, where Stewie is back in the U.S.A, playing baseball in the backyard with Brian. Stewie is batting, and Brian is pitching…)_

Brian (picks up baseball from ground): So Stewie, you never told me how your trip to Japan went. (tosses baseball up and down in the air)

Stewie (takes practice swings with baseball bat): Oh, it was fine. I stayed at a wonderful hotel, ate some authentic sushi and teriyaki chicken, took photos of the Tokyo Tower, visited a real japense garden, took a tour of the studio where" Pokemon" is made, and much more.

Brian: Wow, you really did a lot in Japan. Do you ever plan to go back?

Stewie: Nah, I don't think so. A trip to Japan is a one-time thing to me in my opinion. Anyways, you ready to play some ball?

Brian (gets in throwing position) Oh, you bet I am. First pitch in 3…2…1…NOW! (pitches ball towards Stewie)

Stewie (swings the bat hard, hitting the ball, throwing it out of the backyard): YES! HOME RUN!

 _(The baseball soars through the air, flying over several front yards in the neighborhood. Suddenly, "SMASH!", the baseball his a window of Delightful Mansion From Down The Lane, breaking it. Father walks over to the broken window and picks up the ball…)_

Father (frowns): So, some little kid thinks they can go break MY WINDOWS?! (fire surrounds him) Well, I don't think so. (drops ball and balls up fists) Whoever did this has to pay! (walks downstairs to the living room) Children, I have to go run an errand. Keep the place tidy while I'm gone.

Delightful Children From Down The Lane: Sure thing, Father.

Father: Very good. (exits mansion)

 _(Back with Brian and Stewie. They were looking all around the neighborhood for the baseball…)_

Brian: Well, we checked every backyard of every single house in our block, and we found nothing.

Stewie: Not to mention all of the front yards we checked too. I hope we find it soon. I'm getting hungry for lunch and this ball search is ridiculous!

Brian: Well, if you want to keep searching for the ball, you're on your own. I'm going to finish up my writing. (walks away and heads back to house)

Stewie: Okay, you do that. I'll find the ball and then we'll continue playing.

Father (walks up to Stewie): Excuse me little boy, but would you happen to know who threw a baseball at my house and broke one of my windows?

Stewie: No, I don't think… Hey wait, did you say it was a baseball? Oh my, that baseball belongs to me. Sir, do you have it on you?

Father (grins): No…I have something else. (forms fireballs on both hands)

Stewie (eyes widen and backs away): W-w-w-w-what's that?!

Father: No one destroys my property! (raises hands and prepares to throw fireballs at Stewie) Now, I'm going to DESTROY YOU!

Stewie (pulls out machine gun): Oh, I don't think so! It's YOU who's going to end up in a coffin!

Father: Bring it on, you little brat! (laughs)

 **FIGHT!**

Father (tosses fireballs at Stewie): HIYA!

Stewie (dodges and fires machine gun): EAT LEAD, YOU PIECE OF SHIT!

Father (dodges projectiles and throws more fireballs at Stewie): HAHA! You can't shoot me!

Stewie (runs out of bullets and pulls out shotgun): Think again! (fires shotgun)

Father (dodges kicks Stewie into a fire hydrant nearby): HAHA! (throws more fireballs) TIME TO COOK!

Stewie (jumps out of the way and tackles Father to the ground): That was a big mistake you just made! (delivers several punches to Father's upper body and face)

Father (tries to fight back but to no avail): OW! OW! OW! OW! OW! STOP! OUCH! STOP, THAT HURTS! OUCH! (manages to punch Stewie really hard in the lower body)

Stewie (gets thrown to the ground): OW! THAT HURTS! (runs off)

Father: GET BACK HERE! (chases after Stewie)

Stewie: NEVER! (runs down the street, trying to find a way to defeat and kill Father) Man, this guy is unstoppable! How on Earth am I going to defeat that piece of shit!? (notices random woman exiting car) HAHA! I got an idea! (runs toward lady as she steps out of her car) Hey lady, give me the keys to your car!

Random lady: What? No way! I'm not going to hand over my keys to a random little child!

Stewie (pulls out handgun): You shouldn't have said that! (fires gun, shooting the lady in the stomach, killing her instantly) There! Now, to get those keys! (grabs keys from lady's left hand, jumps into car, closes door, and inserts keys into the ignition cylinder) Maybe I can hit him with the car like I did to that green guy from the park! (puts car in gear and makes a huge U-turn to the right, and begins speeding toward Father) ROAD KILL TIME, OLD MAN! (hits Father with the car, tossing him across the road, and hitting a nearby lamppost)

Father: Oh, that kid is dead now! (uses telekinesis power to lift up the lamppost out of the ground) SUCK LAMPPOST, KID! (uses telekinesis to toss the lamppost at the car like a toy)

Stewie (laughs) Yeah right, like I would actually suck a lamp…(sees lamppost flying towards the front of the car) Oh shit… (jumps into the car's backseat for cover)

 _(The lamppost hits the car, smashing the entire front part of the car, causing it to flip over. Stewie kicks open the back windshield with his foot and gets out of the car…)_

Stewie (pulls out rocket launcher): THAT'S IT! NO MORE MR. NICE BABY! (fires rocket at Father)

Father (gets hit by the rocket, getting thrown to the ground): HEY! You know what? (creates fireball in his hands) That makes me mad! (throws another fireball at Stewie, knocking the rocket launcher out of Stewie's hands) HAHA! NOW, YOU HAVE NO WEAPON!

Stewie (grins): Not quite….(pulls out grenade) EXPLOSION TIME! (pulls pin out and throws it at Father) DIE! (runs off)

Father (gets up and dodges grenade, causing it hit a nearby front yard): Oh, you're really going to pay now! (rushes after Stewie)

Stewie (runs into the garage of his house): I got to get out of here! (gets on his rocket-powered bike, opens up garage door, and speeds off into the main part of the city) YOU CAN'T CATCH ME NOW!

Father (face reddens): OH, YES I CAN! (runs very fast after Stewie) I'LL CATCH YOU, AND WHEN I DO, YOU'LL NEVER SEE THE LIGHT OF DAY AGAIN!

Stewie (pulls out handgun): Oh really? (turns around and aims gun at Father) I think it's YOU who's going to die! (fires gun at Father) ENJOY THAT! (looks forward again)

Father (gets shot in his left foot): AAAAHHHH! (falls over backwards onto ground, clutching his foot in pain) THAT'S IT! NO MORE MR. NICE GUY! (gets up and continues running after Stewie)

 _(Stewie speeds into the center part of the city, speeding past several cars, buses, trucks, taxis, and other vehicles. Stewie turns around and sees Father running through the traffic, throwing more fireballs at Stewie. He keeps on missing and hitting other random vehicles and some pedestrians…)_

Father: GET BACK HERE AND LET ME KILL YOU!

Stewie (turns around): Never! (laughs) This just ain't your day! (turns back around and sees he's about to crash into the library) AAAAAHHHHHH! OH CRAP! (breaks through window and speeds through library, scaring several library-goers, and knocking over dozens of shelves full of various books) EVERYONE, LOOK OUT! GET OUT OF THE WAY! I'M A HOMICIDAL BABY COMING THROUGH! (crashes through glass window on the other side as Father throws more fireballs at Stewie)

 _(As this happens, Meg happens to be sitting down at a nearby table, reading a novel, wearing her earbuds connected to her "MP3" player. She doesn't look up or see anything going on, as she's listening to her music…)_

Father: STOP STALLING AND ACCEPT DEFEAT! (throws more fireballs at Stewie)

Stewie (speeds to the left): NEVER! (pulls out Tommy gun and fires it at Father)

Father (gets hit on the left arm and right leg, falling over onto the ground): OW! THAT HURTS!

Stewie (stops bike in an alleyway and steps off): Ah, perfect. I didn't miss this time! (evil grin) Sir, I think its about time you learn a very valuable lesson. (walks over to cornered Father) Never…ever…mess with…Stewie Griffin…(pulls out machete): It's time for you to bleed…it's time for you to suffer with nothing but pain (holds machete up to Father's neck)

Father: Not today, you little brat…(slowly sits up) I still have one trick up my sleeve...

Stewie: Oh, and what would that trick be?

Father: THIS! (suddenly holds up arms and creates a wall of fire around him) Now, to finish you off! (creates biggest fireball ever) YOU BETTER RUN, YOU LITTLE BRAT! (throws it at Stewie)

Stewie (drops machete and runs off): AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH! HELP! (fireball hits a nearby dumpster and misses Stewie)

Father (steams comes out of his ears): YOU'RE DEAD KID! (uses telekinesis power to lift the dumpster into the air) TRASH TIME! (used telekinesis power to toss the dumpster at Stewie)

Stewie (dodges the dumpster and climbs up a metal ladder nearby, climbing up to the top of a nearby shot building): MISSED AGAIN, LOOSER! (pulls out 5 grenades) PREPARE TO DIE! (pulls out all 5 pins and tosses all of the grenades at Father, who doesn't notice them)

Father: I'M SO ANGRY RIGHT NOW! (grenades land near Father and explode, causing his whole body to get throws against the brick was by the explosion) AAAAAAHHHHHHH! (tires to get back up but to no avail)

Stewie (climbs back down ladder and walks over to Father): Now, to do something that I should've done a long time ago! (pulls out running chainsaw) NO MORE LIVING FOR YOU! (cuts Father in half with chainsaw, causing blood, and intestines to fly all over the place)

Father (in excruciating pain): AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! (dies as his whole body is cut in half) (the fire around him goes out next)

Stewie (grins, turns off chainsaw, and puts it away): HAHA! That'll teach him a lesson not to mess with Stewie Griffin (gets back onto his rocket-powered bike and speeds off, heading back to his neighborhood)

 **KO!**

Boomstick: That…was…AWESOME! MAN, DID YOU SEE THAT!? Did you see that kid kill!?

Wiz: I sure did, Boomstick. As you can see, both Stewie and Father were evenly skilled at combat, but it was Stewie's weapon arsenal, his use of a rocket-powered bike, his determination, element of surprise, and his evil intelligence that gave him the advantage he needed. As opposed to Father, who only has the powers of fireballs and telekinesis to do all of the evil fighting for him. Because of those skill limitations, it was clear that Stewie was to kill him and win right from the start.

Boomstick: It seems that Father won't be coming back home to his children today. The Delightful Children From Fown The Lane now have no father to raise them. And the butler, Hopkins, now has no one to give him his weekly paycheck for all of his hard work.

Wiz: Once again, the winner is Stewie Griffin.

Boomstick: That you all for watching and we'll see you all next time on "Death Battle".

Wiz: He's Boomstick and I'm Wiz, singing off. Our next "Death Battle" will be just as epic as this one! How? Well, you'll all just have to wait for Episode 4 to find out for yourself!

 **THE END!**

 **Well everyone, that's all for this chapter. It looks like after that very epic battle to the death, Stewie Griffin won again. Poor Delightful Children From Down The Lane, it looks like your dad won't be coming back home forever. He's dead and he's not coming back to life. In the next chapter, Stewie Griffin shall fight his next opponent. Who is this next opponent? How will the next battle to the death go? Well, you'll just have to read and find out for yourself. Well, what are we all waiting for? Let's all move on to chapter 4 of this very epic and action-packed miniseries...**


	4. Stewie Griffin VS The DCFDTL

**Hello everyone, I'm back. Yep, I'm back once again with another chapter of Season 2 of this very epic miniseries. In the last chapter, Stewie Girffin fought and killed Father from "Codename: Kids Next Door", making it his biggest defeat of "Death Battle". In this chapter, Stewie Griffin shall fight and try to kill The Delightful Children From Down The Lane, Father's evil children. Who will win this epic battle to the death? Well, you'll just have to read and find out for yourself. Well, what on Earth are we all waiting for? Let's begin chapter 4 of Season 2 of this very epic miniseries...**

Wiz: They're both very you, are very intelligent, and also want to kill each other…

Boomstick: Stewie Griffin, everyone's favorite homicidal baby…

Wiz: And The Delightful Children From Down The Lane, the five evil kids with creepy talking in unison skills.

Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick!

Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a "Death Battle"!

 **Introduction to Stewie Griffin:**

Boomstick: Ah, good old Stewie Griffin. You never know what'll happen when messing with this kid! Needless to say, he LOVES fighting in these "Death Battles" and this is fourteenth battle to the death…

Wiz: We already introduced Stewie Griffin in the last season of "Death Battle", but we still have to do it again due to the rules of "Death Battle".

Boomstick: To make it short and sweet on my part, Stewie Griffin is a homicidal baby that wants complete world domination!

Wiz: This one-year-old is not meant to be messed with. If you do mess with him, he'll probably kill you. Not joking, he WILL kill you if provoked.

Boomstick: Stewie Griffin is the youngest member of the Griffin family, but don't yet his young appearance fool you. He's a damn psychopath!

Wiz: Born on June 30 1999, Stewie Griffin has a very sophisticated psyche and is able to speak fluently in an upper-class English accent. When he was born, his birth doctor found a map of Europe with plans to bomb its capitals inside Lois, his mother.

Boomstick: From that day on, he was shown not to be a normal kid, but a kid with the mind of a criminal. His weapon arsenal is full of classic weapons. These weapons include a machine gun, a tommy gun, a chainsaw, a machete, a flame thrower, a rocket launcher, a crossbow, a laser gun, a few hand grenades, a handgun, and even a harpoon gun. This is one of the reasons you should think twice about messing with Stewie!

Wiz: Not to mention his abilities! He can run fast, jump high, trick his enemies, punch hard, kick hard, and even bite hard. He can yell or curse up a storm, and he can even invent things.

Boomstick: Over the years of the "Family Guy" show, Stewie has invented many futuristic inventions, such as a mind controlling device, a carbonite freeze gun, a hypnotic control device, a hovering drill machine, a teleporter device, a multiverse traveler, a Peter-Bot, a clone machine, rocket skis, a weather device, and even a God-damn time machine! Wow, this is one badass little kid.

Wiz: His inventions are very cool and technologically advanced, and he uses them multiple times. However, due to the rules of "Death Battle", Stewie can't use his time machine. But he can use any of his other inventions.

Boomstick: This all proves one thing…if you want to bully a kid, please make sure that kid is not Stewie.

Wiz: However, he's not PERFECT. When his friend Brian gets into a dangerous situation, its been shown since Stewie and Brain are friends, Stewie CAN get distracted from any of his battles to help save Brian.

Boomstick: Wait, what?! Why on Earth does he care so much at Brian?

Wiz: Well, in one episode, he mentions that because of neglect from Peter, his father, he sees Brain as a fatherly figure, more than Peter. So, because of this, Stewie can get emotional and weak sometimes.

Boomstick: But despite this, Stewie Griffin is still one badass kid!

 **Introduction to The Delightful Children From Down The Lane:**

Boomstick: Man, this is the longest name for any opponent ever featured here on "Death Battle". But don't like the word "Delightful" fool you as looks can be deceiving. These kids are FAR from nice or delightful.

Wiz: The DCFDTL are, for all intents and purposes, one single being; they always speak in perfect synchronization and stand together in group formation at all times.

Boomstick: But each individual kid does have a normal name. Their known normal names are: Bruce (short, blond boy), David (tall, brunet boy), Lenny (boy in football helmet), Constance (short, dark brown-haired girl) and Ashley (as she as referred to by fans) (tall, blond-haired girl).

Wiz: But for the battle to go by easier, we'll just refer to them by the abbreviation of "DCFDTL". After all, the usual name is too long anyways.

Boomstick: Although the Delightful Children answer to Father, they are seen acting independently from him just as often. The Delightful Children rarely partake in direct physical combat, usually sending other villains to do their work and controlling large combat machines.

Wiz: Although the secondary antagonists of the show, they make more appearances in the series than any other villain, and more than any character other than the five members of Sector V. They are also obsessed with behaving properly and wish to become adults as soon as possible.

Boomstick: Well, they have a long way to go before that happens. And man, do they have a long journey ahead of them.

Wiz: All five children have icy, light blue eyes. They wear school uniforms; the three boys are wearing blue uniforms with gray badges, red ties and brown shoes, and the two girls wear white sailor-like dresses with sky blue stripes and matching scarfs with white Mary Jane shoes and pink socks.

Boomstick: But that's enough of what they all look like. Now, let's talk about their backstory…

Wiz: is revealed in "Operation: Z.E.R.O." that the Delightful Children are the operatives of the legendary "lost sector" of the KND, Sector Z. They were captured by Father and placed in his prototype Delightfulization Chamber, which had much stronger effects than intended ("Eleventy Billion-fold", in fact), and completely destroyed the children's individual identities, destroying the unstable machine and creating the hive mind that is the DCFDTL.

Boomstick: The Delightful Children celebrate "their" birthday five times a year, as they are technically five people. Each time, they prepare a delicious cake they intend to eat without sharing with any other kids and force their "guests" to watch as they do so. Sector V personally attempts to stop them from eating their cake at all costs whenever they celebrate their birthday, which occurs six times throughout the series and composes a recurring storyline, throughout which this simplistic scenario is repeated with several variations and exaggerated to absurd lengths. In each of these episodes, the cake is stolen, destroyed or in some way rendered inedible for the Delightful Children, save for Operation: S.I.X., where Numbuh 2 is tricked into personally delivering their cake to them.

Wiz: This leads to Numbuh 362 giving the mission to Sector W in "Operation: I.N.T.E.R.V.I.E.W.S." Their first appearance was in "Operation: C.A.K.E.D.", the very first episode of the series after "No P in the Ool" and the first installment in the aforementioned "C.A.K.E.D." series. Their connection to Father was first revealed in Operation: G.R.O.W.-U.P., also the latter's first appearance, in which he gives them use of the "Really Really Incredibly Destructive Machine" and the Age-Changing Cigar from "Operation: C.A.B.L.E.T.V.". Using these items, the Delightful Children successfully destroy Sector V's treehouse and turn Numbuh 1 into an adult, but they are later defeated along with Father at the end of the season finale.

Boomstick: The Delightful Children have almost never gotten along or worked together with Sector V. However, in "Operation: Z.O.O.", they and Sector V had to work together to escape their zoo enclosures (which they were not on board with at first), only to later reveal their entrapment was part of an elaborate set-up to destroy Sector V.

Wiz: In "Operation: P.A.R.T.Y." they called Sector V to help them get the Teenagers out of their mansion before Father returns home. At first, Numbuh 1 doesn't care about this situation, but the Delightful Children remind him that it's the KND's job to help kids no matter what the consequences are, to which Numbuhs 2-5 agree with the Delightful Children. Numbuh 1 does agree eventually, but he still doesn't trust them.

Boomstick: In "Operation: F.U.G.I.T.I.V.E." it was revealed they keep their toenails in a jar, which Numbuh 86 finds disgusting. Later on, they lose their grip on the jar. When the jar spills, the majority of the toenails land in Numbuh 86's hair, making her scream and run around in circles. When Numbuh 3 and Numbuh 5 saw her covered in toenails, they were grossed out. The Delightful Children, unconcerned about Numbuh 86, tell them, "Don't just stand there! Help us pick up our toenail collection!"

Wiz: In "Operation: U.N.D.E.R.C.O.V.E.R.", Lenny, the child with the helmet, is apparently revealed to be an undercover KND operative and leaves the DCFDTL to assist the team during their attack on the coffee rig, during which time he functions independently and acts like a normal kid. However, this is revealed to be a ruse, and Lenny returns to the Delightful Children towards the end of the episode. Even after this is revealed, Lenny alone is responsible for the error that causes the Delightful Children's defeat, for which the other four call him an idiot, which could mean he might be still against their plans.

Boomstick: In "Operation: F.O.U.N.T.A.I.N.", it was revealed that the Delightful Children were responsible for making Numbuh 1 bald, which was done in such a way that his hair would never grow back. This occurred shortly before he joined the KND, and is never shown and only briefly mentioned, leaving the circumstances of the incident up to the imagination of the viewer. At that same episode, they kidnap Leaky Leona and attempt to destroy the Fountain of Youth in order to prevent anyone from remaining a kid forever, but they failed.

Wiz: One of the worst things that the Delightful Children has done was in Operation: B.U.T.T. when they were going to put a picture of Numbuh 1's butt in the school yearbook to attempt to make him quit his team, with thousands of Robot Crabs taking a picture of his butt. The plan was foiled by the rest of Sector V, and are left embarrassed and run away from the Robot Crabs.

Boomstick: In "Operation: E.L.E.C.T.I.O.N.S.", they make a deal with Chad to let the students of his middle school enslave the students of Gallagher Elementary in exchange for being "promoted" to middle school level, thereby becoming "that much closer to glorious adulthood."

Wiz: In "Operation: C.A.K.E.D.F.I.V.E.", Father creates a moon-sized ice cream cake for his children and attempts to destroy all other ice cream in the universe, planning to have all the children in the world watch as they eat the last ice cream in existence. Father's plan failed, and the delightfuls are covered by the cake itself upon crash landed.

Boomstick: In "Operation: I.T.", the Delightful Children betray their "father" in order to stop his plan to spread broccoli throughout the world to force feed to children, which even they are against, because they are still children, and even they hate broccoli, so they help Numbuh 1 and Numbuh 362 to stop Father.

Wiz: In "Operation: Z.E.R.O.", after the revelation of Sector Z, the Delightful Children are re-commissioned by the re-commissioning Module, restoring them to their former selves as KND operatives; Numbuhs 0.1, 0.2, 0.3, 0.4 and 0.5. However, the effects of delightfulization were so powerful that any reversion is temporary, and the re-commissioning module's effects wear off during the final battle on the moon base. Sector Z's final words to Numbuh 1 as the delightfulization takes hold again are "Tell... the Kids Next Door... that we miss them!" Now, back to their delightfulized selves forever, they pummel Numbuh 1 mercilessly. But Nigel defeats them, and sending them to space in a escape pod.

Boomstick: This is one HUGE backstory. But now, let's talk about their abilities...

Wiz: The DCFDTL are extremely intelligent and can operating heavy machinery and evil fighting robots. They can turn kids into adults, fire laser beams, destroy buildings, and even use radars to track down members of "Kids Next Door". They also have vegetable shooters, rope launchers, and even sharp tools!

Boomstick: So, as you can see Stewie's 4th opponent of Season 2 is no easy person. Its 5 intelligent and evil children who should NEVER be messed with! So, let's see how it all goes down in this epic battle to the death…

 **And now, the actual battle to the death…**

 _(The scene begins in the afternoon, with the DCFDTL at a cemetery, looking sad over Father's grave…)_

DCFDTL: Father, we'll miss you. (drops flowers over the grave) But we'll avenge you. The moment we find your killer, he or she shall be killed by us. (sniffs)

 _(The DCFDTL do not notice Stewie Griffin standing right behind them, grinning at them all…)_

Stewie: Sad moment, isn't?

DCFDTL (turn around to face Stewie): What do you mean by that?

Stewie: Well, you now have no father to raise you all. Sad, isn't it? Well, it's a shame that he died, but I bet you would be glad to know who his killer is.

DCFDTL: Wait, you know the killer?!

Stewie (grins): As a matter of fact, I do. (reaches behind his back) I'll give you one hint…He's right in front of you!

DCFDTL: Wait…you killed our father?!

Stewie (pulls out machine gun): Yes, I did! And now, you pathetic children are next! (clocks gun)

DCFDTL (frowns): OH YEAH!? (pull out laser guns) Not unless we kill you first!

Stewie: Bring it on, you little shits!

 **FIGHT!**

DCFDTL (attacks Stewie by firing lasers): Take that!

Stewie (dodges laser beams and fires machine gun): NEVER! EAT LEAD!

DCFDTL (dodges bullets and runs out of laser beams) Hmmm, no lasers. (pulls out knife guns) Well then, eat steel you little brat! (fires knives)

Stewie (jumps up high to dodge knives): You'll never win! (pulls out shot gun) TAKE THIS! (shoots a bullet, hitting Lenny (the boy in football helmet), killing him instantly) HA-HA! That's one down!

Remaining DCFDTL: AAAAAHHHHH! You killed Lenny!

Stewie (laughs): HAHA! I sure did! (aims shotgun at other children) Now, anyone else want to get shot!?

DCFDTL: AAAAAAAHHHHHHH! (runs away in fear) HELP! SOMEONE IS TRYING TO KILL US! HEEEEEEEEEELP!

Stewie (chases after them): GET BACK HERE! (clocks shot gun) I MUST KILL YOU ALL!

DCFDTL (runs onto bench and jumps off, landing on top of a speeding bus): HAHA! Now you can't catch us!

Stewie (gets onto his bike and speeds after the bus): Think again, you shitty kids! (aims Tommy gun and fires it at the DCFDTL, hitting Ashley (the tall, blond-haired girl), killing her instantly)

Remaining DCFDTL: ASHELY, NOOOOOOOO! (pulls out a book bag, open it up, pulling out a remote control) You little brat! You're going to pay for that! (turns on remote, causing several long robotic arms to shoot out of the book bag, going after Stewie) IT'S PINCHING TIME!

Stewie (dodges pinching robotic arms): AH-HA! Guess again! (pulls out chainsaw and slices the pinchers off the robotic arms) HA! Now, you have no pinchers to pinch me!

DCFDTL (pulls out a vegetable shooter): EAT VEGGIES, YOU LITTLE BRAT! (fires random vegetables at Stewie)

Stewie (dodges vegetables): EEEEEWWWW! Don't you kids ever eat any GOOD foods? Cake? Ice cream? Cookies? Pie? Brownies? Candy?

DCFDTL: Only on our birthday! (runs out of vegetables) Drat, we missed!

Stewie (pulls out harpoon gun): PREPARE TO DIE! (fires harpoon as bus turns left, hitting a lamppost light instead) Shit, I missed!

DCFDTL: HAHA! YOU SURE DID! (pulls out Adult-Gun) Ready to become an adult?! (fires ray as the bus makes another left turn)

Stewie (dodges ray): CRAP! (turns bike to the left, almost hitting a random dog) JUST DIE, ALREADY, BRATS! (pulls out crossbow and fires arrows at the DCFDTL)

DCFDTL (dodges the arrows, jumps off the truck, and tackles Stewie to the ground, knocking over his bike) You've been a bad boy! Time for some spankings! (smacks Stewie all over his face)

Stewie: OW! OW! OUCH! OUCH! AAAHHH! AAAHHH! OUCH, THAT HURTS! OW, STOP IT! OW! PLEASE, STOP IT! OUCH! OW! OW! OW! OW! OUCH! OUT, THAT HURTS! STOP IT! (begins to cry)

DCFDTL: NEVER! You killed two of our siblings, and now, you must pay the price with 1,000,000 spankings!

Stewie (begins punching the DCFDTL, fighting back very hard): OH YEAH!? (pulls out machete and swings it hard, cutting off the head of), Constance (the short, dark brown-haired girl), killing her instantly)

Remaining DCFDTL (grabs Stewie and lifts him off the ground): THAT'S THE THRID ONE OF US YOU KILLED! (faces redden)

Stewie (laughs): Yeah, so?

DCFDTL (pulls out new laser guns): We are going to burn you into ashes!

Stewie (pulls out flamethrower): OH YEAH!? (fires flamethrower, setting the remaining two children on fire)

DCFDTL (in pain): AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! (let go off Stewie, drop onto the ground, and roll, putting out the fire) Big mistake, right there! (fires laser guns at Stewie, missing him as he dodges the laser beams)

Stewie (drops flamethrower and pulls out katana): DODGE THIS, YOU LITTLE SHITS! (swings katana at David (the tall, brunet boy), cutting off his head, killing him instantly)

Remaining DCFDTL (Bruce, the short, blond boy): YOU KILLED ALL OF MY SIBLINGS! (kicks the katana out of Stewie's hand and grabs Stewie by the neck collar, lifting him off the ground) Well, well, well, well…it looks like I've caught you now…

Stewie (shivers in fear): LET ME GO! Please! I'm sorry for killing your father! I really am! Can't we just settle this matter like reasonable gentlemen?

DCFDTL: No. (pulls out knife) It's time for you to suffer. You killed my dad, and now, its time that I return the favor. (puts blade up to Stewie's neck) Any last words?

Stewie (shivers): Well, as a matter of fact, I do have some last words…

DCFDTL (lowers knife): What are these last words?

Stewie (reaches behind his back): My last words…are…THIS! (suddenly pulls out kitchen knife and slashes it on Bruce's throat very quickly, slitting it, killing him instantly)

 _(Bruce dies and let's go of Stewie, falling over onto the ground. His neck continues to bleed as Stewie puts his knife away, and walks away…)_

Stewie (grins): HAHA! Now THAT'S what I call a surprise death attack (laughs) Well, I better be on my way! (puts his rocket-powered bike back upright, gets up onto his bike, and speeds off) Well, now to go find something to eat. I'm really hungry right now. (speeds off to find something to eat)

 **KO!**

Boomstick: OH MAN! THAT WAS SO EPIC!

Wiz: As you can see, the DCFDTL and Stewie were both evenly skilled in combat, but Stewie's history of being undefeated and his lethal weapon arsenal gave him the bigger advantage that he needed to win.

Boomstick: Despite the DCFDTL's skills, weapons, intelligence, and abilities, they just didn't match up to Stewie enough to beat him at his own game.

Wiz: And in the past, the DCFDTL have been defeated DOZENS of times before by the "Kids Next Door" children, outsmarting them by 110%!

Boomstick: Now, all of the "Kids Next Door" children can rejoice in peace and harmony, knowing that the DCFDTL are dead and are burning in Hell for all that they did in the past.

Wiz: Once again, the winner is Stewie Griffin.

Boomstick: Thank for all for watching and we'll see you all next time on "Death Battle!"

Wiz: He's Boomstick and I'm Wiz, signing off.

 **THE END!**

 **Well, that's it for chapter 4 of Season 2 of this very epic miniseries. It looks like Stewie Griffin has won once again. Yep! Not even the Delightful Children From Down The Lane can defeat this homicidal baby. Yep, NOTHING CAN STOP HIM! In the next chapter, Stewie Griffin shall take on ANOTHER opponent. Who is this next opponent? Well, you'll just have to read and find out for yourself. I'm not going to spoil it all now. Well, what on Earth are we all waiting for? Let's all move on to chapter 5 of Season 2 of this very epic and action-packed** **miniseries.**


	5. Stewie Griffin VS Mordecai and Rigby

**Well everyone, I'm back once again. Yep, I'm back with ANOTHER chapter of Season 2 of this very epic miniseries. In this chapter, Stewie Griffin shall turn a simple trip to get snacks into ANOTHER act of homicide. His next opponent is not one but TWO people who are known for slacking off during work and playing video games. Who are they? Who will win this next battle? Well, you'll just have to read and find out for yourself. I'm not going to spoil it all for you now. It would not be very nice of me, would it? No, no it would not be very nice of me. Well, what on Earth are we all waiting for? Let's all begin chapter 5 of Season 2 of this very epic miniseries...**

Wiz: They both have amazing skills, they both can drive a vehicle very fast, and they also want to kill each other.

Boomstick: Stewie Griffin, everyone's favorite homicidal baby…

Wiz: And Mordecai and Rigby, two guys who love video games.

Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick!

Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a "Death Battle"!

 **Introduction to Stewie Griffin:**

Boomstick: Ah, good old Stewie Griffin. You never know what'll happen when messing with this kid! Needless to say, he LOVES fighting in these "Death Battles" and this is fifteenth battle to the death…

Wiz: We already introduced Stewie Griffin in the last season of "Death Battle", but we still have to do it again due to the rules of "Death Battle".

Boomstick: To make it short and sweet on my part, Stewie Griffin is a homicidal baby that wants complete world domination!

Wiz: This one-year-old is not meant to be messed with. If you do mess with him, he'll probably kill you. Not joking, he WILL kill you if provoked.

Boomstick: Stewie Griffin is the youngest member of the Griffin family, but don't yet his young appearance fool you. He's a damn psychopath!

Wiz: Born on June 30 1999, Stewie Griffin has a very sophisticated psyche and is able to speak fluently in an upper-class English accent. When he was born, his birth doctor found a map of Europe with plans to bomb its capitals inside Lois, his mother.

Boomstick: From that day on, he was shown not to be a normal kid, but a kid with the mind of a criminal. His weapon arsenal is full of classic weapons. These weapons include a machine gun, a tommy gun, a chainsaw, a machete, a flame thrower, a rocket launcher, a crossbow, a laser gun, a few hand grenades, a handgun, and even a harpoon gun. This is one of the reasons you should think twice about messing with Stewie!

Wiz: Not to mention his abilities! He can run fast, jump high, trick his enemies, punch hard, kick hard, and even bite hard. He can yell or curse up a storm, and he can even invent things.

Boomstick: Over the years of the "Family Guy" show, Stewie has invented many futuristic inventions, such as a mind controlling device, a carbonite freeze gun, a hypnotic control device, a hovering drill machine, a teleporter device, a multiverse traveler, a Peter-Bot, a clone machine, rocket skis, a weather device, and even a God-damn time machine! Wow, this is one badass little kid.

Wiz: His inventions are very cool and technologically advanced, and he uses them multiple times. However, due to the rules of "Death Battle", Stewie can't use his time machine. But he can use any of his other inventions.

Boomstick: This all proves one thing…if you want to bully a kid, please make sure that kid is not Stewie.

Wiz: However, he's not PERFECT. When his friend Brian gets into a dangerous situation, its been shown since Stewie and Brain are friends, Stewie CAN get distracted from any of his battles to help save Brian.

Boomstick: Wait, what?! Why on Earth does he care so much at Brian?

Wiz: Well, in one episode, he mentions that because of neglect from Peter, his father, he sees Brain as a fatherly figure, more than Peter. So, because of this, Stewie can get emotional and weak sometimes.

Boomstick: But despite this, Stewie Griffin is still one badass kid!

 **Introductiom of Mordecai and Rigby:**

Boomstick: Do you like video games? Do you like eating pizza and snacks? Do you like drinking soda? Do you like taking rides on a golf cart? Well then if you do, you should definitely be friends with Mordecai and Rigby.

Wiz: Mordecai and Rigby are two very good friends, who both like video games, sodas, snacks, and driving the golf cart very fast. They've been good friends since high school and college, and are still friends to this day.

Boomstick: Since Mordecai and Rigby both have different backstories and backgrounds, we won't be able to talk about them individually. However, we CAN talk about their abilities and skills before the "Death Battle" begins…

Wiz: First of all, it's been shown that they both have amazing skills when it comes to playing video games. They know several fighting combinations, several cheat codes, as well as many ways to defeat certain levels.

Boomstick: They can also drive the park's golf cart pretty well, doing several dangerous maneuvers, jumps into the air, spins, and even sharp turns. They can also dodge projectiles while in the golf cart, as well as catch up to their enemies in it.

Wiz: And sometimes, both Mordecai and Rigby can obtain temporary weapons or temporary powers. For example, in "Death Punchies", Rigby stole a page from a book, and learned that he needed a mullet and cutoffs to execute the Death Punch, becoming an expert. He conquered the park with his new punch, avenging his defeats and making the park workers his slaves. Mordecai then discovered the source of Rigby's powers and in response learns another "Death Kwon Do" move to defeat him.

Boomstick: And besides the other "Death Kwon Do" move that Mordecai once used, he's also very physically fit for unarmed hand-to-hand combat. He and Rigby can run fast, jump high, kick, punch, and smack their enemies.

Wiz: With all of these abilities and skills, Stewie Griffin surely has a lot to deal with when it comes to these opponents.

Boomstick: Let's see how well he does in this very epic battle to the death.

 **And now, the actual battle to the death…**

 _(The scene begins with Stewie Griffin riding his rocket-powered bike down the streets. He stops at a red light near the fence of the park…)_

Stewie: Man, I'm so hungry. I really need something to eat! (looks to the left and sees the park's snack stand in the distance) Hmmm, now that's an idea that I can live with! (turns to the left and drives into the park, towards the snack stand)

 _(Scene cuts to snack stand, where Mordecai and Rigby are standing around, bored, and waiting for customers…)_

Mordecai: Ugh, man, this is such a boring job assignment!

Rigby: Yeah, I can't take it anymore! (bangs fist on table) I just want to have some excitement today!

Stewie (rides up to area around snack stand, stops bike, and steps off): Ah, perfect. Still open so I can purchase food! (walks up to the counter of the snack stand) Hello, good sirs.

Mordecai (looks down at Stewie): Oh, uh…hi there. How can we help you?

Stewie (looks up at menu): Hmm, let me see… I'll have 4 hot dogs, 2 bags of chocolate chip cookies, 2 soft pretzels, 6 bags of popcorn, an order of nachos and cheese sauce, 5 bags of cotton candy, 10 candy bars, 8 and a bottle of orange soda.

Rigby (nods and types order on the cash register): Well kid, your total comes to $76.34! (holds out hand): Pay up, please!

Stewie (reaches into his pockets and pulls out the 60 dollars): Here you go! (hands it to Rigby)

Rigby (counts the money): Uh, Mordecai, he's $16.34 short.

Mordecai (counts money): Hmmm, I see…(looks down at Stewie) Sorry kid, but you're $16.34 short. Sorry kid, but you won't be able to pay for your snacks. (hands 60 dollars back to Stewie)

Stewie (frowns and puts money back into his pocket): I'll be back…(glares at Mordecai and Rigby angrily and walks away)

Mordecai (as Stewie disappears from view): Rigby, I don't like the way that kid looked at me.

Rigby: Really? He didn't seem that creepy to me…

 _(At that point, "WHOOSH!", Rigby and Mordecai notice Benson's car speeding towards them…)_

Mordecai and Rigby: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

 _(Stewie crashes the car into the snack stand, breaking the concrete counter, making snacks and condiments fall onto the ground, and causing tons of property damage. Mordecai and Rigby fall backwards from the force of the impact…)_

Mordecai: What the heck?!

Rigby: Benson just tried to kill us!

Stewie (steps out of car): Actually, it wasn't Benson. It was me, Stewie Griffin. I killed that gumball machine-headed man!

Mordecai: Wait! You KILLED BENSON?!

Rigby: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Stewie (pulls out machine gun): Prepare to die, morons! (clocks gun) This'll teach you not to deny service to Stewie Griffin! (grins)

 **FIGHT!**

Stewie (fires machine gun): DIE!

Mordecai (dodges bullets along with Rigby): Dude, relax! We can talk about this, okay!?

Stewie (stops firing machine gun): Hmmm…no. You denied me service, so now, I'm going to deny you of your life! (continues firing machine gun)

Rigby (holds up pizza box to stop bullets): Please! I'm too young to die!

Stewie (keeps firing machine gun): TOO BAD!

Mordecai: RIGBY, RUN! LET'S GET OUT OF HERE!

 _(Rigby and Mordecai get up and run out of the snack stand, get into the golf cart, and speed away…)_

Stewie (drops machine gun and chases after them): GET BACK HERE! (grabs onto back to golf cart)

Rigby (sees Stewie in rear-view mirror): AAAAAHHHHH! MORDECAI, HE'S GRABBING ONTO THE CART! THROW HIM OFF!

Mordecai: I'LL TRY! (turns sharply left and right, trying to throw Stewie off, but to no avail) DUDE, HE'S NOT FALLING OFF!

Rigby: TRY HARDER, MORDECAI!

Stewie (jumps off back of golf cart and onto Mordecai, chocking him): DIE, YOU PIECE OF SHIT! DIE!

Mordecai (chocking): Help…me…Rigby! (tries to yank Stewie off but to no avail)

Rigby: MORDECAI! (let's go of steering wheel and grabs onto Stewie, trying to yank him off of Mordecai) Let…him…go!

Stewie (does so): FINE! I'LL CHOKE YOU INSTEAD! (grabs Rigby and begins chocking him) DIE!

 _(Suddenly, the out-of-control golf cart slides off the paved road and crashes into the shallow lake nearby. Mordecai, Rigby, and Stewie get thrown off the cart and into the lake. Stewie continues to choke Rigby, holding him in a headlock. At that very moment, "SNAP!", Stewie pulls too hard and break's Rigby's neck, killing him instantly…)_

Mordecai (gasps): RIGBY! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Stewie (let's go of Rigby's dead body): YES! He's dead! (pulls out handgun) That's one down and one to go!

Mordecai (backs away in fear): Why are you doing this!?

Stewie: Are you seriously asking why I'm trying to kill you, piece of shit? You denied service to me! I was hungry and you said I didn't have enough money! (aims handgun)

Mordecai: Kid, chill out! You only had 60 dollars and your order was 76 dollars and 34 cents! You were 16 dollars and 34 cents short! You should've excluded parts of your order and could've paid for everything with no problems! (gets out of lake and runs off)

Stewie (fires handgun but misses): GET BACK HERE! (chases after Mordecai)

Mordecai (sees motorcycle in the distance): I GOT TO GET OUT OF HERE! (jumps on motorbike and speeds away)

Stewie (gets onto his rocket-powered bike and speeds after Mordecai): LET ME KILL YOU! (continues firing handgun)

Mordecai (speeds down the road, passing by multiple vehicles, lampposts, and pedestrians): I got to lose him! But how?! (notices the entrance gates of "Warner Bros Studios" up ahead) Perfect! He'll never find me there! (speeds into metal entry gate, knocking it over, and entering the main studio grounds)

Security guard (falls over after Mordecai nearly hits him): WHAT THE HECK!? (gets up) Now that's something you don't see every day!

Stewie (speeds past the guard, still chasing after Mordecai): MOVE OUT OF THE WAY, YOU PIECE OF SHIT!

Security Guard: OR THAT! (runs off in fear)

Mordecai (turns bike to the left, passing a wardrobe building and a random soundstage): Crap, that kid is still after me! (turns to the right as Stewie fires more bullets at him) Where am I going to hide?! (suddenly sees backlot up ahead with a filming crew using it for the live broadcast of "Grease: Live") Oh no… (speeds toward school carnival set in backlot area) I've got to warn everyone!

Director: And we're rolling the finale in 5…4…3…2…1…ACTION!

 _Ensemble cast on the set (dancing and singing): We go together,_

 _Like rama lamma lamma ka dinga da dinga dong_

 _Remembered forever,_

 _As shoobop sha wadda wadda yippity boom de boom!_

 _Chang chang changitty chang shoobop,_

 _That's the way it should be, wha ooohhh,_

 _Oh, yeah!_

 _We're one of a kind,_

 _Like dip da dip da dip doowop da doobee doo!_

 _Our names are signed,_

 _Boogedy boogedy boogedy boogedy shoobee doowop shebop!_

 _Chang chang changitty chang shoobop,_

 _We'll always be like one, wa wa wa one…_

 _(Suddenly, Mordecai breaks down the fence and speeds onto the set, casuing many of the actors to fall over, interrupting the live broadcast of "Grease: Live"…)_

Director: What the?! CUT! CUT! CUT THE CAMERAS! CUT! (jumps off chair and runs over to Mordecai as he stops the bike in the middle of the set) What the Hell are you doing out here!? This set is CLOSED OFF! I'm trying to film "Grease: Live", and here you are, causing trouble and interrupting my live broadcast! What is the meaning of this?!

Mordecai: Sir, this is an emergency! (snatches director's megaphone and turns it on) ATTENTION EVERYONE, RUN FOR YOUR LIVES! THERE'S A HOMICIDAL BABY ON THE LOOSE! RUN! NOW! GET OUT OF HERE WHILE YOU STILL CAN!

 _(All of the cast members and stagehands laugh, not thinking that Mordecai was serious…)_

Aaron Tveit (as Danny Zuko) (laughs): AHAH! Very funny, sir! Look, I'm trying to enjoy my limelight here! Go away and stop playing games! This is just as bad as yelling "fire" in a theater!

Mordecai: Dude, I'm not joking around! EVERYONE, RUN! NOW! EVACUATE THE PREMISES!

 _(Suddenly, Stewie speeds into the backlot area, holding a Tommy gun. He stops his bike in the center of the set and stands up on the seat…)_

Stewie (clocks Tommy gun): EVERYONE WHO IS NOT THE BLUE JAY, LEAVE NOW OR I'LL KILL ALL OF YOU!

Aaron Tveit: HOLY CRAP, HE'S REAL! EVERYONE, RUN!

 _(The whole cast, the crew members, and the director run off in all directions, leaving Mordecai and Stewie all alone in the set of the school carnival…)_

Stewie: So, you thought that you could escape me simply by running into this school carnival set, huh? (aims Tommy gun at Mordecai) Well, now I've caught you! It's time to die, you piece of shit!

Mordecai: Dude, please don't kill me! (drops megaphone) We can talk about this, okay!?

Stewie: Hmm…let me think…NO! (fires machine gun as Mordecai takes off running)

Mordecai: AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! (runs off but gets shot multiple times in the back, and falls over, still moaning while trying to crawl away)

Stewie (stops firing machine gun and walks over to Mordecai's weak body): Well, well, well, it looks like it's time to die! (pulls out knife) Any last words?

Mordecai (suddenly remembering his "Death Kwon Do" move from the past): Yes…THIS! (sits up quickly and punches Stewie in the stomach, sending him flying through the air, hitting one of the carnival rides)

Stewie (face reddens): BIG MISTAKE! (jumps off carnival ride and tackles Mordecai to the ground, punching him and kicking him in the face, causing his nose to bleed)

Mordecai (tries to fight back but to no avail): STOP! OW! OW! OW! OW! OUCH! OUCH! STOP IT, PLEASE! OW, THAT HURT'S!

Stewie (stops hitting and punching): Fine…(pulls out knife): I'LL STAB YOU INSTEAD! ANY FINAL WORDS WITH NO TRICKS!?

Mordecai: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Stewie (grins): Fair enough! (stabs Mordecai 20 times in the chest, killing him instantly)

Mordecai: AAAAAAHHHHHH…(dies)

Stewie (puts knife away and steps off Mordecai's dead body): HAHAHAHAHA! YES! I DID IT! I KILLED HIM! (gets back onto rocket-powered bike and starts it up) Time to go back to the park and steal those snacks! (laughs and drives off)

 **KO!**

Boomstick (crying): NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! WHY MORDECAI AND RIGBY? WHY!? WHY DID THEY HAVE TO DIE?!

Wiz (sighs): Boomstick, stop that loud crying. You're being such a baby! Anyways, as you can see, during the course of the fight, Stewie had the upper-hand right from the start as he's more intelligent and tricky than Mordecai and Rigby are. Mordecai and Rigby do have great skills too, but Stewie is more lethal and more skilled than they area, allowing him to kill them off instantly.

Boomstick (sniffs): Mordecai and Rigby are in Heaven now, all thanks to Stewie Griffin. There, they can enjoy unlimited video games, pizza, snacks, and sodas. (wipes tear off left side of face) R.I.P Mordecai and Rigby. I'll miss you! (cries)

Wiz (sighs and gives Boomstick a pat on the back): There, there Boomstick, it'll be alright. (hands Boomstick a tissue) Once again, the winner is Stewie Griffn.

Boomstick (through his tears): Thank you all for watching…(sniffs) and we'll see you next time on "Death Battle"! (cries and runs out of studio)

Wiz (sighs and gets up): Sorry folks, I got to go check on Boomstick there. He's not happy about Mordecai and Rigby getting killed today. (turns off Boomstick's radio microphone) He's Boomstick, and I'm Wiz, signing off, (turns off his radio microphone and exits the room through the door behind him)

 **THE END!**

 **Well, that's all for this 5th chapter of Season 2. It looks like Mordecai and Rigby both got killed by Stewie Griffin. Sad, isn't it. Oh, and I bet none of you were expecting the cameo appearance of the cast of "Grease: Live", were you? No, no I bet you were not. Thankfully, no one got hurt but now, Mordecai and Rigby are both dead. Now, only Skips, Pops, and High-Five Ghost are the only ones left alive in the park. Well, its time for us all to move on. In the next chapter, Stewie Griffin's next opponent shall be one with a French accent, trying to rob his house. Who is this next opponent? Who will win? Well, you'll just have to read and find out for yourself. Well, let's all move on to chapter 6 of Season 2 of this very epic miniseries...**


	6. Stewie Griffin VS Le Quack

**Well, I'm back everyone. I'm back with another chapter of Season 2 of this very epic miniseries. In the last chapter, Stewie Griffin fought and killed both Mordecai and Rigby. In this chapter, a very short but action-packed battle to the death will take place, with Stewie's opponent being Le Quack from "Courage the Cowardly Dog". Who will win this battle to the death? Well, you'll just have to read and find out for yourself. I'm not going to spoil it all now. Well, what are we all waiting for? Let's begin chapter 6 of Season 2 of this very epic miniseries...**

Wiz: They both are intelligent, are really sneaky, can both steal stuff, and they also to kill each other.

Boomstick: Stewie Griffin, everyone's favorite homicidal baby…

Wiz: And Le Quack, a very sneaky and evil con artist duck.

Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick!

Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a "Death Battle"!

 **Introduction to Stewie Griffin:**

Boomstick: Ah, good old Stewie Griffin. You never know what'll happen when messing with this kid! Needless to say, he LOVES fighting in these "Death Battles" and this is sixteenth battle to the death…

Wiz: We already introduced Stewie Griffin in the last season of "Death Battle", but we still have to do it again due to the rules of "Death Battle".

Boomstick: To make it short and sweet on my part, Stewie Griffin is a homicidal baby that wants complete world domination!

Wiz: This one-year-old is not meant to be messed with. If you do mess with him, he'll probably kill you. Not joking, he WILL kill you if provoked.

Boomstick: Stewie Griffin is the youngest member of the Griffin family, but don't yet his young appearance fool you. He's a damn psychopath!

Wiz: Born on June 30 1999, Stewie Griffin has a very sophisticated psyche and is able to speak fluently in an upper-class English accent. When he was born, his birth doctor found a map of Europe with plans to bomb its capitals inside Lois, his mother.

Boomstick: From that day on, he was shown not to be a normal kid, but a kid with the mind of a criminal. His weapon arsenal is full of classic weapons. These weapons include a machine gun, a tommy gun, a chainsaw, a machete, a flame thrower, a rocket launcher, a crossbow, a laser gun, a few hand grenades, a handgun, and even a harpoon gun. This is one of the reasons you should think twice about messing with Stewie!

Wiz: Not to mention his abilities! He can run fast, jump high, trick his enemies, punch hard, kick hard, and even bite hard. He can yell or curse up a storm, and he can even invent things.

Boomstick: Over the years of the "Family Guy" show, Stewie has invented many futuristic inventions, such as a mind controlling device, a carbonite freeze gun, a hypnotic control device, a hovering drill machine, a teleporter device, a multiverse traveler, a Peter-Bot, a clone machine, rocket skis, a weather device, and even a God-damn time machine! Wow, this is one badass little kid.

Wiz: His inventions are very cool and technologically advanced, and he uses them multiple times. However, due to the rules of "Death Battle", Stewie can't use his time machine. But he can use any of his other inventions.

Boomstick: This all proves one thing…if you want to bully a kid, please make sure that kid is not Stewie.

Wiz: However, he's not PERFECT. When his friend Brian gets into a dangerous situation, its been shown since Stewie and Brain are friends, Stewie CAN get distracted from any of his battles to help save Brian.

Boomstick: Wait, what?! Why on Earth does he care so much at Brian?

Wiz: Well, in one episode, he mentions that because of neglect from Peter, his father, he sees Brain as a fatherly figure, more than Peter. So, because of this, Stewie can get emotional and weak sometimes.

Boomstick: But despite this, Stewie Griffin is still one badass kid!

 **Introduction to Le Quack:**

Boomstick: Normally if you see someone breaking into your house and stealing stuff, it's usually okay to pull out a gun or something and threaten to hurt that person. But if you see that the robber is Le Quack, you might just want to escape and let him be.

Wiz: Le Quack is a French con artist duck who always tries to score a fortune. He's one of the major antagonists of "Courage the Cowardly Dog". Despite his look of being a cue little duck, like most of the antagonists in the series, he is much stronger than he appears to be.

Boomstick: Le Quack's exploits with Courage first began when he was employed as a specialist to cure Muriel's amnesia. Unbeknownst to the dog, the 'professional' he hired was actually a skilled thief and sought only to rob them.

Wiz: When he arrived at the farmhouse, he was rudely greeted by the owner, a man whom Le Quack quickly struck and incapacitated. Armed with a large mallet, he victimized and tortured Muriel in unusual ways to persuade her to remember the location of her valuables. Unfortunately for him, Courage was there each time to prevent his efforts, but continually vanished before Le Quack had the chance to handle him.

Boomstick: At last, the duck caught up with his suppressor, and, using a vacuum, seemed to have resolved the situation once and for all. In that instance, the cops arrived and handcuffed the criminal, ending a very prolonged search. Le Quack was not held for long, however, and after destroying the car and stealing a police uniform, he swore revenge on Courage.

Wiz: And from that moment on, Courage has had at least 3 more times, hoping to get revenge on and kill Courage. He's tried hypnotism and the use of a hot air balloon to do the evil job. But despite his sneaky and clever attempts, he never succeeds in doing so.

Boomstick: But that's enough of his basic background. Let's talk about his skills and abilities, which he really doesn't have much off. One of Le Quack's main weapons is a large mallet, which he uses in most battles.

Wiz: He can also jump high, run fast, dodge projectiles from his enemies, and even get into clever disguises to cover up his true identity.

Boomstic: So, as you can see, Stewie's clever opponent is up for a "Death Battle" any day, despite his lack of skills and abilities. So, let's see what happens in this "Death Battle".

 **And now, the actual battle to the death…**

 _(The scene begins at night with Brian sitting down at the sofa, reading a novel. Stewie is upstairs in his bedroom, coming up with more inventions to create. Peter, Lois, Meg, and Chris are on vacation for the week in Florida. Outside the house, Le Quack arrives in his car, with a plan to rob the house…)_

Le Quack: Oh yes, this is the big night. Once inside the house, I'll steal all of the money, move back to France, buy a fancy house, get a new girlfriend, and start a new life! (grabs empty pizza box and steps out of car) Now, to start phase one…(walks up to the front door)

 _(As Brian continues to read his book, there's a knock at the door…)_

Brian (looks up): Who is it?

Le Quack (from outside): Pizza man! I have your pizza here…

Brian (gets up from sofa): Finally, our pizza is here. (opens door) Hello sir, you took a while to get here. (gets wallet out)

Le Quack (hands Brian the pizza box): Sorry sir, but I got stuck in traffic. (smiles)

Brian (grabs box and opens it up, seeing no pizza inside): Hey sir, there's no…

Le Quack (quickly pulls out mallet and hits Brian over the head, knocking him unconscious): HIYA! (puts mallet away) Perfect! (grins) Stage one: complete. (steps over Brian's unconscious body and enters the house) Now, to find the money and get out…

 _(Suddenly, Stewie walks downstairs…)_

Stewie (walks into living room): Brian, is the pizza here yet…(sees Brian's unconscious body) What the?! BRIAN! BRIAN, NO! (runs over to him, passing Le Quack) BRIAN, SPEAK TO ME! (bends down by his side)

Le Quack (faces Stewie): Oh, and who might you be?

Stewie (shakes Brian's body): Hi sir. I'm Stewie Griffin, but I can't talk right now! (lightly taps Brian's head) Brian, WAKE UP!

Le Quack: Oh, poor thing. That dog looked like a very nice person…until, I knocked him out cold…

Stewie (looks up): You what?! (frowns) YOU DID THIS TO BRIAN?! (pulls out machine gun) Well, I never! I'll make you pay the price for what you did to Brian!

Le Quack (laughs and pulls out mallet): Bring it on, you stupid baby!

 **FIGHT!**

Stewie (fires machine gun): DIE, YOU STUPID DUCK!

Le Quack (blocks bullets with mallet): Oh yeah?! Well, you're not having much luck here! I'm dodging your bullets, you baby!

Stewie (continues firing bullets): Oh, but I'm better than you, you little shit! (runs out of bullets) SHIT! (pulls out knife and runs towards Le Quack) Now, I'm going to chop of your head!

Le Quack (grins and swings mallet at Stewie): Not unless I beat you first!

Stewie (dodges and tries to stab Le Quack but to no avail): DIE, YOU LITTLE SHIT! (tries to stab Le Quack again)

Le Quack (swings mallet, hitting Stewie's hand, knocking the knife out of his hand): AH-HA! Now, you have no knife! (laughs and tackles Stewie, knocking him to the floor) Now, it's time for pain! (raises mallet over his head, ready to hit Stewie)

Stewie: Not today! (punches Le Quack in the face, causing him to drop his mallet) I'm going to put YOU in pain! (knocks Le Quack off of him, onto the floor, and punches him multiple times, all over his body)

Le Quack (in excruciating pain): OW! OW! OUCH! OUCH! STOP IT! OW, THAT HURTS! LOOK, I'M SORRY! OW! OW! OW! OW! PLEASE, STOP IT! OUCH!

Stewie (keeps punching Le Quack): NEVER! I'LL KEEP ON BEATING YOU UNTIL YOU'RE DEAD! (pulls out golf club and begins to whack with it) FEEL THE PAIN AND SUFFER!

Le Quack: That's it! I tried to get you to stop nicely, but now, I'm going to REALLY hurt you! No more Mr. Nice Duck! (pushes Stewie back and gets up, pulling out a baseball bat) Time for an epic beating that you'll never forget! (swings bat at Stewie)

Stewie (dodges and runs upstairs): You'll have to catch me first, you little shit! (runs into his bedroom and slams his door shut)

Le Quack (bangs on Stewie's bedroom door): OPEN THE DOOR! (kicks the door) OPEN THE DOOR! (whacks door with baseball bat) Little boy, let me in. Or else, I'll huff, and I'll puff, and I'll blow your house in! (laughs)

Stewie: Okay, first of all, that "Three Little Pigs" joke only works in the movie, "The Shinning". And second of all, you messed with the wrong baby! (busts down door with his Hover-Drill invention) IT'S DRILLING TIME!

Le Quack (gasps): What the?! What's that?!

Stewie (grins as he controls the Hover-Drill): It's one of my many inventions, duck. (starts sharp metal drill) It's time to be stabbed and drilled to death!

Le Quack (drops baseball bat and runs off in fear): AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Please, don't hurt me! (jumps over Stewie and runs downstairs) HAVE MERCY, PLEASE!

Stewie (chases after Le Quack with Hover-Drill): GET BACK HERE! (chases Le Quack all around the house) NO ONE HURTS BRIAN! I'LL MAKE YOU PAY THE PRICE FOR HURTING HIM!

Le Quack (gets cornered against the garage door): I've got to get out of here! (tries to open door, but to no avail as it was locked) Oh shit, it's locked!

Stewte (approaches Le Quack): Trying to escape, aren't you? (grins) Too bad. Brian keeps the garage door locked when Peter and Lois aren't around.

Le Quack: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Stewie (speeds toward the cornered Le Quack): DEATH TIME! (rams into Le Quack, stabbing him with the metal drill, causing blood to fly everywhere)

Le Quack (in pain as blood flies everywhere): AAAAAAAHHHHHHH! (dies)

 _(Le Quack's now-blood-covered body falls off of the drill and onto the floor. Stewie turns off the Hover-Drill, lands on the floor, steps off, and walks over to Le Quack's dead body…)_

Stewie (grins): That'll teach him not to hurt Brian! (picks up Le Quack's body) You know, I'm in the mood for some barbeque right now. (walks outside to where the grill was) Time to turn you into a delicious duck dish!

 _(Scene cuts to montage of Stewie Girffin cooking Le Quack over the grill and cleaning up the bloody mess in the hallway at the same time. Once the blood was cleaned up, Stewie walks back to the grill and opens up the metal lid…)_

Stewie (grins): Ah, perfect. (stabs Le Quack's body with barbeque fork and places him on a plate) Time to serve you with a side of French fries and eat up! (turns off grill, closes metal lid, and walks into kitchen) Stay here while I get the frozen fires. (sets plate on counter and opens freezer to get bag of frozen French fries)

Brian (regains consciousness): Ugh, that was painful. (gets up) I better order another pizza and check on Stewie. (walks into living room, grabs phone, and orders another pizza) Okay, that's done. (hangs up phone) Hey, what's that smell? (goes into kitchen and sees Stewie place a handful of heated-up French fries around Le Quack's dead body) Stewie, what the Hell?!

Stewie (looks up): BRIAN! (runs over to him and hugs him) BRIAN YOU'RE ALRIGHT! YOU'RE NOT DEAD!

Brian (hugs Stewie back): Of course, I'm not dead! That stupid pizza delivery duck just knocked me out cold with a mallet! (Sees Le Quack's dead body on the plate) This is him right here! Stewie, what did you do to him?!

Stewie (grins): Well, since he hurt you, I wanted to avenge you. So, I killed him after he tried to kill me, and now, he's a delicious grilled duck dish. (hands Brian a knife and fork) Have a taste Brian, I already removed the bones and internal organs.

Brian (cuts a piece): Well, alright… I guess it's okay as long as it was self-defense…(eats the piece) Hmmm, yummy. Stewie, this is really good. Can I have some more? The pizza wont be here for another 30 minutes or so…

Stewie: Sure. We'll share it as an appetizer course until the pizza arrives. (cuts a piece and eats it) Yum, it's just as good as you said it is. So, you want to eat it until the pizza arrives?

Brian: That sounds like a plan, Stewie. (continues to eat Le Quack and French fries with Stewie)

 **KO!**

Boomstick: Man, that was a very short but action-packed battle to the death. And that dish looks very delicious. I sure wish I can cook up a barbeque dish like that. Man, I have to go back and finish culinary school.

Wiz: As you can see, Stewie Griffin and Le Quack were both evenly skilled in combat, but Stewie's weapons and element of surprise, and his Hover-Drill invention gave him a much bigger advantage during the fight. Le Quack is a good fighter, but he's just not as lethal or skilled as Stewie is, and he's been beaten in the past by Courage and the police.

Boomstick: Well, it looks like Le Quack's robbery days are over, all thanks to Stewie. And, I don't think anyone will be missing him anytime soon, especially after all of the bad things he's done in the past. And Courage can now sleep soundly, knowing that Le Quack is burning in Hell for all of the crimes that he commited.

Wiz: The winner is Stewie Griffin.

Boomstick: Thank you all for watching and we'll see you all next time on "Death Battle"!

Wiz: He's Boomstick and I'm Wiz, signing off…

 **THE END!**

 **Well, that's all for this chapter. I hope I made none of you readers hungry for barbecued meat after reading this 6th chapter of Season 2. Yep, this one might've been a little short, but it's all I could come up with for the time being. In the next chapter, Stewie Griffin shall fight his next opponent, who is also a villain from "Courage the Cowardly Dog". Who is this next opponent? Well, you'll all just have to read and find out for yourslef. Well, what on Earth are we all waiting for? Let's all move on to chapter 7 of Season 2 of this very epic miniseries...**


	7. Stewie Griffin VS Katz

**Hello again, everyone. I hope you all enjoyed the last "Death Battle" chapter. Sorry I haven't been posting chapters recently**. **I've been very busy with college work. But now, I'm back on track once again. In this chapter, Stewie Griffin shall fight another opponent from, "Courage the Cowardly Dog". Who is this new opponent? Well, you'll just have to read and find out for yourself. I'm not going to spoil it all now. Well, what are we waiting around for? Let's begin chapter 7 of Season 2 of this very epic and action-packed miniseries...**

Wiz: Ah, cats. They're so fluffy, and they make very cute pets. But in this battle, you may think twice about getting a cat for a pet.

Boomstick: Stewie Griffin, everyone's favorite homicidal baby.

Wiz: And Katz, a red cat with the mind of a criminal.

Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick!

Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a "Death Battle".

 **Introduction of Stewie Griffin:**

Boomstick: Ah, good old Stewie Griffin. You never know what'll happen when messing with this kid! Needless to say, he LOVES fighting in these "Death Battles" and this is seventeenth battle to the death…

Wiz: We already introduced Stewie Griffin in the last season of "Death Battle", but we still have to do it again due to the rules of "Death Battle".

Boomstick: To make it short and sweet on my part, Stewie Griffin is a homicidal baby that wants complete world domination!

Wiz: This one-year-old is not meant to be messed with. If you do mess with him, he'll probably kill you. Not joking, he WILL kill you if provoked.

Boomstick: Stewie Griffin is the youngest member of the Griffin family, but don't yet his young appearance fool you. He's a damn psychopath!

Wiz: Born on June 30 1999, Stewie Griffin has a very sophisticated psyche and is able to speak fluently in an upper-class English accent. When he was born, his birth doctor found a map of Europe with plans to bomb its capitals inside Lois, his mother.

Boomstick: From that day on, he was shown not to be a normal kid, but a kid with the mind of a criminal. His weapon arsenal is full of classic weapons. These weapons include a machine gun, a tommy gun, a chainsaw, a machete, a flame thrower, a rocket launcher, a crossbow, a laser gun, a few hand grenades, a handgun, and even a harpoon gun. This is one of the reasons you should think twice about messing with Stewie!

Wiz: Not to mention his abilities! He can run fast, jump high, trick his enemies, punch hard, kick hard, and even bite hard. He can yell or curse up a storm, and he can even invent things.

Boomstick: Over the years of the "Family Guy" show, Stewie has invented many futuristic inventions, such as a mind controlling device, a carbonite freeze gun, a hypnotic control device, a hovering drill machine, a teleporter device, a multiverse traveler, a Peter-Bot, a clone machine, rocket skis, a weather device, and even a God-damn time machine! Wow, this is one badass little kid.

Wiz: His inventions are very cool and technologically advanced, and he uses them multiple times. However, due to the rules of "Death Battle", Stewie can't use his time machine. But he can use any of his other inventions.

Boomstick: This all proves one thing…if you want to bully a kid, please make sure that kid is not Stewie.

Wiz: However, he's not PERFECT. When his friend Brian gets into a dangerous situation, its been shown since Stewie and Brain are friends, Stewie CAN get distracted from any of his battles to help save Brian.

Boomstick: Wait, what?! Why on Earth does he care so much at Brian?

Wiz: Well, in one episode, he mentions that because of neglect from Peter, his father, he sees Brain as a fatherly figure, more than Peter. So, because of this, Stewie can get emotional and weak sometimes.

Boomstick: But despite this, Stewie Griffin is still one badass kid!

 **Introduction to Katz:**

Wiz: Katz is a smooth and sadistic feline with a British accent, and comes complete with his own sinister background theme music. Like most cats, he has a powerful distaste for dogs, however he reserves a special hatred for Courage. Since his debut, Katz's top priority has always been helping or advancing his situation in some way.

Boomstick: He is competitive, as shown in "Katz Kandy", where he tries to force Muriel to tell him her secret ingredient for her sweet recipes after coming in second place to her in the Nowhere Sweet Stuff Contest for years. Thus, crushing his competition is nothing new to Katz. Katz enjoys a few things, such as making confectionery treats, or managing his collection of spiders. The only things he shows much compassion for outside of his own interest are his "loves" (his spiders).

Wiz: He is quite the con artist, as well, specializing in scam businesses such as a vacation resort, a confectionery shop, a motel, and a submarine cruise line. It is shown that he often kills his customers; for example, he fed the residents of the Katz Motel to his spiders. Two of his common targets are, of course, Eustace and Muriel (who never seem to remember him from previous cons). Even if Muriel and Eustace are fooled by whatever service he is providing, Courage never falls for his schemes. Because of this, all of his businesses enforce a strict "No Dogs Allowed" policy, which forces Courage to have to sneak in to save his two owners.

Boomstick: Despite his sinister nature, Katz has always enjoyed a bit of pre-defeat "sport" with Courage, which he is quite apt at. The two then engage in small battles in the form of games, such as a handball or a staring contest. It is common in some of these games that Katz will egg his opponent on into losing. For example, during the said staring contest, he kept saying "blink" when he saw Courage's eyes watering. And while he may choose to do things with the least exerted effort on his part when he can afford it, he has shown some slightly above-average athleticism-first shown in A Night at the Katz Motel when he drinks tea and reads while playing racket ball, continued in Klub Katz when he flees wrecking ball Eustace.

Wiz: Now, let's talk about his abilities. He can run fast, dodge projectiles, jump high, and even trick or distract his enemies in very small pieces of time. He's been shown to be very patient, as he never breaks down in sadness when he fails his evil schemes.

Boomstick: So, with that being said, Stewie Griffin has A LOT to fight with here today. So, let's begin this "Death Battle" and see who wins and who…well…die.

 **And now, the actual battle to the death…**

 _(The scene begins with Stewie Griffin taking a walk through the forest at sunrise. Katz happens to be walking through the exact same forest. He's holding a tray of candy samples in front of him…)_

Stewie: Ah, nothing like a nice walk in the woods to start off my morning. (turns left and Katz walks up to him)

Katz: Oh, hello little boy. (holds out tray in front of Stewie)

Stewie: Ugh, who are you? I'm in the middle of a morning walk…

Katz: Yes, I can see that. Well, I recently opened up a candy store down the street and I'm going around town, giving out free samples.

Stewie: Sorry sir, but I'm going to have to decline that offer. My mom says to never take candy from strangers.

Katz (smiles): Please sir, I insists.

Stewie (steps back): Step away…

Katz (grins): Please?

Stewie: (steps back some more): I'm warning you…

Katz (smiles and approaches Stewie)

Stewie: Alright, now you pushed me too far! (pulls out machine gun)

Katz (widens eyes): Uh oh…(Drops tray)

 **FIGHT!**

Stewie (fires machine gun): EAT LEAD, YOU PERVERT!

Katz (dodges bullets): Haha! You can't kill me, you silly little boy. (grins and pulls out crowbar) Now, I think you need a spanking!

Stewie: I do not, you little shit! (pulls out katana and swings it at Katz) HIYA!

Katz (dodges): Missed!

Stewie (swings katana some more): Oh yeah?!

Katz (dodges blade): YEAH! (hits Stewie on the back with the crowbar)

Stewie (falls over in pain and drops gun): OOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWW! (reaches for gun) Must…reach…gun…

Katz (kicks gun away): Hahahaha…(grabs Stewie by his neck collar and lifts him off the ground) Now, little boy, I'm going to kill you off! (pulls out knife and puts blade to Stewie's neck) Any last words?

Stewie (reaches behind his back): Yes….THIS! (pulls out can of pepper spray and sprays Katz in the eyes)

Katz (drops Stewie and covers his eyes): AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH! MY EYES!

Stewie (tackles Katz to the ground and begins using karate moves to beat him up): HIYA! TAKE THAT AND THAT! TAKE THIS! ENJOY THE PAIN, YOU PIECE OF SHIT! (kicks Katz in the face, breaking his nose)

Katz (stomps on Stewie's foot, making him let go): OW! YOU BROKE MY NOSE! (gets up and pulls out a sword) You…must…pay…for that! (swings sword at Stewie)

Stewie (dodges sword and pulls out whip): You've been a bad kitty! (snaps whip Katz, hitting him on the butt)

Katz (falls over on the ground): AAAAAAAAHHHHHH! MY BUTT! OW!

Stewie (pulls out golf club): That's what you get for approaching me, you piece of shit! (whacks Katz multiple times with golf club)

Katz (in pain): OW! OW! OW! OUCH! OUCH! STOP IT! OW! OW! PLEASE, MAKE IT STOP! OW! OUCH! OW! OUCH! OW! (struggles to get up but to no avail) OW! OW! OUCH! STOP IT, PLEASE! I SURRENDER! PLEASE KID, HAVE MERCY!

Stewie (pulls out handgun): Beg for mercy all you want, but I'm not stopping until you're dead! (shoots Katz in both kneecaps)

Katz (clutches legs in pain): AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH! Listen kid, we can talk about this, okay!? We don't have to be violent…(reaches for a knife hidden behind his back)

Stewie (pulls out flamethrower): Think again, you piece of shit! (fires flamethrower at Katz, burning him really badly)

Katz (gets burned to a crisp, killing him right there and then): AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! (gasps for air) curse…you…little…shitty…brat…(coughs)...I…hope…you…burn…in…Hell…(takes a final breath, gasps for air, closes his eyes, and dies)

Stewie (turns off flamethrower): There, that should teach this stranger a lesson. (outs flamethrower away) Well, I better get back to my walk. Up next, is taking a walk around the city. (turns around) I think I should grab some lunch money first…(walks away, back to his house)

 **KO!**

Boomstick: Wow! That was…short…and cool, by the way!

Wiz: Both opponents are evenly skilled when it comes to combat, but it was Stewie's more violent and non-failure history that gave him the upper-hand he needed. Katz's skills have failed over the years, but Stewie's skills have NEVER failed him ONCE! So, as you can see, Katz is no match for a baby like Stewie Griffin.

Boomstick: Now, all of Nowhere, Kansas can relax peacefully, knowing that this kitty is dead and burning in Hell.

Wiz: Once again, he winner is Stewie Griffin.

Boomstick: Thank you all for watching and we'll see you next time on "Death Battle"!

 **THE END!**

 **Well, that's all for this chapter. Yep, it looks like Katz could not beat Stewie Griffin like he thought he could. Instead, he got killed and is now going to Hell for all the bad things he's done. In the next chapter, Stewie Griffin shall fight another opponent. This next opponent is from "Regular Show" he wants to avenge the deaths of Muscle Man, Benson, Mordecai and Rigby. Who is this next opponent? Well, you'll just have to read and find out for yourself. Well, what are we all waiting for? Let's all move on to chapter 8 of Season 2 of this very epic miniseries...**


	8. Stewie Griffin VS Professor Poopypants

**Well everyone, I'm back. I'm back with Episode 8 of Season 2 of this action-packed miniseries. Sorry about not updating this second season in a while. Not only have I been busy with college work, but I also ran out of Death Battle ideas for a while. But I got inspired for this 8th episode of Season 2 after seeing the new "DreamWorks" film, "Captain Underpants: The First Epic Movie". In this episode, Stewie Griffin shall fight the film's villain, Professor Poopypants. How will that all go down? Well, you'll just have to read and find out. Well, let's all begin Episode 8 of Season 2 of this very epic miniseries...**

Wiz: Intelligence. You should always use this brain ability wisely. Otherwise, you'll end up…well…like the people in today's "Death Battle".

Boomstick: Stewie Griffin, everyone's favorite homicidal baby with the intelligence of a criminal.

Wiz: And Professor Poopypants, the evil scientist with the name that seems like it belongs to a circus clown.

Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick!

Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a "Death Battle".

 **Introduction to Stewie Griffin:**

Boomstick: Ah, good old Stewie Griffin. You never know what'll happen when messing with this kid! Needless to say, he LOVES fighting in these "Death Battles" and this is eighteenth battle to the death…

Wiz: We already introduced Stewie Griffin in the last season of "Death Battle", but we still have to do it again due to the rules of "Death Battle".

Boomstick: To make it short and sweet on my part, Stewie Griffin is a homicidal baby that wants complete world domination!

Wiz: This one-year-old is not meant to be messed with. If you do mess with him, he'll probably kill you. Not joking, he WILL kill you if provoked.

Boomstick: Stewie Griffin is the youngest member of the Griffin family, but don't yet his young appearance fool you. He's a damn psychopath!

Wiz: Born on June 30 1999, Stewie Griffin has a very sophisticated psyche and is able to speak fluently in an upper-class English accent. When he was born, his birth doctor found a map of Europe with plans to bomb its capitals inside Lois, his mother.

Boomstick: From that day on, he was shown not to be a normal kid, but a kid with the mind of a criminal. His weapon arsenal is full of classic weapons. These weapons include a machine gun, a tommy gun, a chainsaw, a machete, a flame thrower, a rocket launcher, a crossbow, a laser gun, a few hand grenades, a handgun, and even a harpoon gun. This is one of the reasons you should think twice about messing with Stewie!

Wiz: Not to mention his abilities! He can run fast, jump high, trick his enemies, punch hard, kick hard, and even bite hard. He can yell or curse up a storm, and he can even invent things.

Boomstick: Over the years of the "Family Guy" show, Stewie has invented many futuristic inventions, such as a mind controlling device, a carbonite freeze gun, a hypnotic control device, a hovering drill machine, a teleporter device, a multiverse traveler, a Peter-Bot, a clone machine, rocket skis, a weather device, and even a God-damn time machine! Wow, this is one badass little kid.

Wiz: His inventions are very cool and technologically advanced, and he uses them multiple times. However, due to the rules of "Death Battle", Stewie can't use his time machine. But he can use any of his other inventions.

Boomstick: This all proves one thing…if you want to bully a kid, please make sure that kid is not Stewie.

Wiz: However, he's not PERFECT. When his friend Brian gets into a dangerous situation, its been shown since Stewie and Brain are friends, Stewie CAN get distracted from any of his battles to help save Brian.

Boomstick: Wait, what?! Why on Earth does he care so much at Brian?

Wiz: Well, in one episode, he mentions that because of neglect from Peter, his father, he sees Brain as a fatherly figure, more than Peter. So, because of this, Stewie can get emotional and weak sometimes.

Boomstick: But despite this, Stewie Griffin is still one badass kid!

 **Introduction to Professor Poopypants:**

Boomstick: Names. They held identify every single one of us. From birth, our names are given to us by our parents, and they stick with us forever…unless you want to legally change it.

Wiz: And no one has a more funnier name out there than Professor Pee-Pee Diarrheastein Poopypants, an odd, German-accented scientist, all the way from New Swissland.

Boomstick (bursts out laughing): Professor Pee-Pee Diarrheastein Poopypants?! (falls over and rolls on floor) What kind of a name is that?! (laughs some more) Was be born in a circus or something?!

Wiz: No, Boomstick. He was born in New Swissland. I know, the name sounds funny, but that's why he became evil.

Boomstick (stops and stands up) Tell me more…(sits back down)

Wiz: Well, as I was saying, Professor Pee-Pee Diarrheastein Poopypants was a scientist and genius inventor who was simply trying to solve the problem of world hunger and trash problems. But when presenting his invention ideas to any college or inventor's society club, people tehre just laughed at him over his silly name.

Boomstick: But who could blame them? That name is way for funnier than MY name!

Wiz (sighs): Boomstick, your name isn't that funny. Be thankful that no one laughs at you all the time. Anyways, as you can see, he tried to take it and ignore it, but one day, after presenting his invention called the "Sizeinator 2000" to the "Nobel Peace Prize Committee", he got laughed at, and he finally snapped, and he began to wreak havoc on the entire audience, shrinking everyone in the crowd, and getting away with it. And from that moment on, he became an evil genius inventor, bent on ridding the world of all laughter.

Boomstick: And when he met Melvin Sneedly, a kid with no sense of humor (literally), and he convinced him to join him in his evil plot, using his "Sizeinator 2000" to turn Melvin's invention, the "Turbo Toilet 2000" into a MASSIVE "Turbo Toilet 2000"! Together, with their intellectual abilities, they nearly succeeded in ridding all the children in the local school of their laughter…until they were defeated by Captain Underpants, George, and Harold. Seriously though, how did 2 kids and a man in underpants beat an evil scientist?

Wiz (sighs): Boomstick, I'm not going to spoil it for you right now. Go see the "Captain Underpants" movie if you want more information.

Boomstick: Aw man!

Wiz: Professor Poopypants's abilities include high levels of intelligence, he can run fast, dodge projectiles, counterattack several attacks from opponents, and he can also jump over obstacles. His weapon arsenal not only includes the ""Sizeinator 2000", and the giant "Turbo Toilet 2000", but he also has simple weapons from his briefcase. These weapons include and axe, a spiky mace, a chainsaw, his own flamethrower, a handgun, a bear trap, and several sticks of dynamite. And not only that, but he also as several homemade weapons as well, including the, "Gerbil Jogger 2000" and a set of 2 "Robo-Boxers". But dude to the rules of "Death Battle", he cannot use his "Robo-Boxers", as they're voice activated and can fight FOR him. But he CAN use any other inventions that he wants to use.

Boomstick: Well, it seems that Stewie is up against one badass opponent hers! He's literally got it all! A crazy name, a good backstory, an amazing weapon arsenal, and a reason of his WHY his doing all of this evil stuff.

Wiz: Well Boomstick, are you ready for a very epic episode of "Death Battle"!?

Boomstick: Oh, you bet I am! Let's all not waste any more time and begin this extra-long and action-packed "Death Battle"!

 **And now, the actual battle to the death…**

 _(This "Death Battle" episode takes place after the "Captain Underpants" 2017 movie. The scene begins with Stewie Griffin on his rocket-powered bike, driving down the road. He stops at a red light_

Stewie: Oh man, I'm so glad I decided to use my bike today instead of walking. There's a lot of people out here on the sidewalk like New York City on Black Friday. (turns on attached radio) Hey, I wonder if I can hack into police radio frequencies again…(turns knob left and right) Oooh, here's one…

Radio frequency (voice): Units 231 – 240, there is a bank robbery being reported downtown at 45th Av 76th street, just next to the local flower shop.

Police officer (voice): Copy that, chief. I'll dispatch those units and then I'll be on my way.

Stewie (turns off radio): A bank robbery!? COOL! YES, THAT'S JUST WHAT I NEED! I can rush by the bank, and steal the money that the robbers took! It's a perfect way for me to spend my day! (light turns green) Time to go! (speeds off, passing by several cars)

 _(Scene cuts to the outside of the local bank being robbed. Professor Poopypants, wearing his purple and green suit (evil scheme outfit) from the movie, exits the bank, holding 4 sacks of money…)_

Professor Poopypants (laughs): SUCCESS! (lifts bags up over his head) I'M RICH! (laughs) With my new "Sizeinator 2000", I was able to shrink all of the citizens, scare those bank tellers, and force them to give me all the money! It might've only been 4 sacks, but it was worth it!

Stewie (approaches the bank on the right, holding out his right arm, and holding the handlebar with his left hand) Alright, I must be very steady. (increases speed and sees Professor Poopypants holding the money sacks) Perfect…it's snatching time! (speeds past Professor Poopypants and snatches the 4 sacks of money) YOINK! (laughs)

Professor Poopypants (shocked): What the?! (turns around and sees Stewie): HEY!

Stewie (stops bike and looks over at Professor Poopypants): Oh, I'm sorry. Looking for these? (holds up money sacks)

Professor Poppypants: Yes! (holds up fist) I stole those bags of money fair and square!

Stewie (lowers sacks and places them into basket in front of handlebars): Well, too bad! (laughs) You can't have them! (speeds off) BYE, BYE, LOOSER!

Professor Poopypants (face reddens with anger): Alright little baby, you crossed the line! (waves fist in air) NO ONE STEALS MY STOLEN MONEY! (gets into his car, buckles up, closes door, and speeds after Stewie)

Stewie (now almost a mile away from the bank's location): Ah, it's like taking candy from a baby…(pause)…you know, now that I think about it, this is my third time already saying that quote. (shrugs) Oh well, its hard to be original at times. (turns left at a "Stop" sign)

Professor Poopypants (speeds up behind Stewie's bike with his car): He's not getting away! Not with my money! (opens window and sticks head out) Hey, kid!

Stewie (turns around): What the duce?!

Professor Poopypants: Give me back those money sacks!

Stewie (rubs chin): Hmmm…let me think about that…NO! (laughs) I stole it and stealers are keepers!

Professor Poopypants: Well, I gave you a chance to give it up easy. But since you want it to go the hard way…(pulls out "Sizeinator 2000") I'm going to shrink you and put you into my pocket!

Stewie (turns left): Oh yeah? (turns around and pulls out machine gun): We'll see about that! (clocks gun) Bring it on, small guy!

Professor Poopypants: Small guy?! Call me Professor Poopypants, if you don't mind. I, Pee-Pee Diarrheastein Poopypants, shall defeat you, take you to my lab, perform some painful tests, and KILL YOU!

Stewie: Professor Pee-Pee Diarrheastein Poopypants!? (laughs) THAT'S THE FUNNIEST NAME I'VE EVER HEARD! (laughs louder)

Professor Poopypants: STOP IT! STOP LAUGHING! (sets dial on invention to "Shrinkify") Ugh, why on Earth did I reveal my WHOLE NAME?! Little baby, you're about to regret your sorry diapered butt for messing with me, Professor Pee-Pee Diarrheastein Poopypants! (puts finger on trigger) Say goodbye to your size, you little brat!

Stewie (puts finger on trigger of machine gun): I don't think so!

 **FIGHT!**

Stewie (fires machine gun at Professor Poopypants): Eat lead, Professor Poopyman!

Professor Poopypants: Missed me, missed me, now you got to kiss me! (laughs as he dodges bullets) Eat THIS! (fires "Sizeinator 2000" at Stewie's machine gun, shrinking it): Oh look, now your machine gun is a MINIGUN! GET IT?! (laughs)

Stewie: HEY! THAT WAS MY BEST MACHINE GUN, YOU PIECE OF SHIT! (pulls out crossbow) That ray gun of yours is going to PAY! (fires arrow at Professor Poopypants, hitting him in the arm)

Professor Poopypants: OOOOOOOOWWWWWWW! (yanks arrow out of his left arm) Little baby, you messed with the wrong man! (fires "Sizeinator 2000" again, missing Stewie and hitting a cement truck instead, shrinking it)

Stewie (dodges and holds bags of money over the edge): That's it! If you won't leave me alone, NO ONE GETS THE MONEY! (drops bags of money, making them fall into an open manhole cover! (stops bike and steps off)

Professor Poopypants (stops car and steps out): NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! It took me over 3 HOURS to make my bank robbery plans! And you, a little baby, RUINED IT FOR ME! (aims "Sizeinator 2000" at Stewie) Now, you'll really PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY! (fires it at Stewie)

 _(At this point, several cars, taxicabs, trucks, and motorcycles in the middle of the road get blocked, but most of the drivers and passengers flee the area, as they see all of the violence between Stewie and Professor Poopypants take place…)_

Stewie (dodges ray and suddenly tackles Professor Poopypants to the ground): I'm going to kill YOU, YOU PIECE OF SHIT! (karate attacks Professor Poopypants with hard hits and kicks all over his body)

Professor Poopypants (tries to fire his "Sizeinator 2000" ray again, but to no avail): OW! OW! OW! OW! OW! OW! OW! OUCH! OUCH! OUCH! OUCH! OUCH! OUCH! STOP IT! OW! OW! PLEASE, STOP IT! OW! OW! OW! STOP IT! OW!

Stewie (snatches "Sizeinator 2000" out of Professor Poopypants's hands) Sorry Mr. Professor Poopypants, your days of shrinking random people are over! (tosses "Sizeinator 2000" into the air, causing it to hit the street, breaking it into pieces)

Professor Poopypants (face reddens and steam pours out of ears): Little baby, PREPARE TO PAY THE PRICE FOR BREAKING ONE OF MY GREATEST INVENTIONS! (gets up and shoves Stewie off of him) I think it's time you pay the price and let me kill you! (pulls out axe) How about I chop off your head?!

Stewie (gasps and gets up in fear, realizing Professor Poopypants is really mad at him): Uh…NO! (runs toward bike) I'M OUT OF HERE!

Professor Poopypants: Not so fast! (tosses axe at bike, hitting the bike's gas tank and causing the bike to explode)

Stewie (gasps): What the duce?! (turns around to face Professor Poopypants)

Professor Poopypants (laughs): HAHA! Now, you have no bike to get away! (laughs) Now, its time for this little baby to have a permanent TIME OUT! (pulls out remote)

Stewie (laughs): A remote!? What does it do? Turn on the TV so you can sit on your lazy ass and watch the news all day?! (laughs)

Professor Poopypants (pushes blue button on remote): Nope. Its my lastest and most evil of all my inventions! (grins as the ground begins to vibrate)

Stewie: What the duce?! Why is the ground shaking?!

Professor Poopypants (grins): Little boy, meet the "Turbo Toilet 2000"!

 _(The giant "Turbo Toilet" moves into view, crushing 2 random houses in the process. The massive invention bends over and lowers a small metal ladder. Professor Poopypants climbs up the ladder, gets inside the control room, gets behind the controls, raises the ladder, and arms the invention's massive arms and legs…)_

Professor Poopypants (on invention's intercom system): PREPARE TO DIE, LITTLE BABY BRAT! (makes invention stomp massive foot and run after Stewie)

Stewie: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH! (runs away as the "Turbo Toilet 2000" runs after Stewie, crushing multiple random houses, signs, trees, and stores in the process) This is NOT good! I've got to find a way out of here before I get crushed to death! (runs to the left, as the "Turbo Toilet 2000" crushes another random house. (sees a random car in the distance up ahead) AH-HA! I got an idea!

 _(At this point, Mr. Krup was driving down the road, heading over to "Jerome Horwitz Elementary School" to begin his work day…)_

Mr. Krup: Oh man, I hate going to work. (grumbles) But it's the only job I can support due to me HATING children, smiling, and laughing. (turns left and stops at "Stop" sign)

Stewie (appears in front of car and pulls out shotgun): YOU! Sir, get out of the car!

Mr. Krup (stunned): Huh? Is that a little…BABY!? (opens window and sticks head out) Hey kid, please move out of the way so I don't hit you and end up in jail. Okay?

Stewie (clocks gun): Acutally, I got a better idea. (aims gun) Get out of the car and leave the keys inside!

Mr. Krup: What?! No way! I'm NOT giving up my car! And I'm especially, not giving up my car to a little baby with a toy gun! (frowns) Now, move out of the way…now, or else!

Stewie (glares): This isn't a toy gun, you piece of shit! (fires gun 5 times, hitting the hood of the car)

Mr. Krup (shocked and horrified): AAAAAHHHHH! OH MY GOSH, ITS A KILLER BABY! IT'S LIKE THAT "CHUCKY" MOVIE COMING TO LIFE! (shivers) FINE! I'll do what do you say! (opens car door and stops out, holding his hands over his head) Just please don't shoot me!

Stewie (grins and puts gun away): Thank you sir. That's more like it! (runs up to front door, jumps into car, closes door, and drives off) YES! Now, to outrun that giant toilet! (turns left, going over the speed limit) Now THIS is what I call a joyride! (looks in rear-view mirror, seeing giant "Turbo Toilet 2000" machine chasing after him) I've got to outrun this thing and destroy that funny-named professor before he kills me! (turns to the left, nearly hitting a group of random joggers)

 _(The scene briefly cuts back to Mr. Krup, now on the sidewalk, holding his mouth open in shock about what he just saw…)_

Mr. Krup (rubs his eyes): Now, that's something you don't see every day. But I still got to get to school! (runs down the sidewalk) I guess I'll try to get there on foot!

 _(The scene cuts back to Stewie speeding away in Mr. Krup's car, dodging the attacks of the massive "Turbo Toilet 2000" invention, as well as dodging multiple cars, trucks, buses, taxicabs, pedestrians, and even a fleet of police cars chasing after Stewie…)_

Stewie: What can I do?! This car chase won't last forever! (notices 6-story parking garage on the left next to a local hospital building) Hmmm, I've got an idea! (turns to the left, speeds past the guardhouse, and begins speeding up all 6 levels of the parking garage, one by one, dodgeing several other random cars as he does) Come on, come on! I'm almost at the top!

Professor Poopypants (over the invention's intercom): Oh, does the baby want to play "Hide-and-Go Seek"? (laughs) Well, I'm in! (makes massive "Turbo Toilet 2000" jump onto the top of the parking garage) Oh baby, where are you?!

Stewie (drives up to the 6th and final floor at that very moment and opens window): HERE I' AM, YOU PIECE OF SHIT! COME AND GET ME! (speeds fast towards the edge of the building as one of the robotic arms of the "Turbo Toilet 2000" reaches down to grab the car) HAHAHA! Run, run, run as fast as you can! You can't catch me, I'm Stewie Griffin! (speeds up and jumps of the edge of the parking garage, flying into the air) AAAAAAHHHHH! THIS FEELS LIKE A SCENE FROM THE MOVIE, "FAST AND FURIOUS"!

 _(The robotic arm just misses the car as it flies through the air, and "SMASH", into a glass-walled building, which happens to be the local hospital. The car crashes into the windows of the 34th floor, and lands in a random waiting room, scaring all of the doctors, nurses, patients, and visitors inside. Stewie stops the car engine, swings open the car door, and pulls out a handgun…)_

Stewie: Hello everyone. Sorry about the mess and property damage. (clocks gun) Please do me a huge favor and get the fuck out of my sight before I kill you all.

 _(All of the patients, visitors, doctors, and nurses scream in fear, and run out of the room in multiple directions. Stewie grins and puts his gun away…)_

Stewie (laughs): Now that's what I call a whole-room evacuation. (grins and turns around) And it looks like that crazy man has finally given up chasing after me!

 _(Suddenly, "SMASH!", the massive "Turbo Toilet 2000" robot used one of it's fists and smashed a massive hole into the side of the building, knocking the car out of the way, making the car fly over the receptionist desk and into another interior wall. The massive toilet robot's face smashed a huge hole inside the building, too…)_

Professor Poopypants (over the invention's intercom): HERE'S PROFESSOR POOPYPANTS! (laughs and pulls lever, sending the left robotic arm reaching for Stewie)

Stewie: Oh crap! (runs away from robotic arm, trying to not get caught) I better get out of here! (gets cornered against a wall suddenly) Uh oh, I'm cornered!

Professor Poopypants (laughs): NO ONE CAN SAVE YOU NOW! (laughs)

 _(Suddenly, the robotic arm stops reaching for Stewie and simply drops to the floor, causing severe damage to the floor. The entire "Turbo Toilet 2000" robot falls to it's knees, leans over forward, closes its eyes, and stops moving all together, causing extra damage to several hundred mirrors along the building. On ground level, every single doctor, nurse, receptionist, patient and visitor is running out of the building, as an evacuation process is going on. However, several hundred other patients were still in the hospital, unable to evacuate, as they are in intensive care and post-surgery rooms for the time being. Several hundred staff members )_

Professor Poopypants: WHAT?! NO! I ALMOST CAPTURED YOU! (looks down at gas meter) OUT OF GAS?! (growls) Impossible! I filled up several hours ago!

Stewie (laughs and runs down hallway): HAHAHAHAHAHA! Now, you can't catch me!

Professor Poopypants: Oh no, you don't! (jumps out of control room and into the building through the massive hole in the glass walls) GET BACK HERE! (chases after Stewie)

 _(The scene shows Stewie run down the hallway of the hospital's 34th floor, with Professor Poopypants chasing after Stewie…)_

Stewie: You can't catch me! (laughs) You're too slow!

Professor Poopypants: GET BACK HERE AND LET ME KILL YOU!

Stewie (runs to the left): NEVER!

Professor Poopypants (runs to the left, almost slipping on a section of wet floor): Oh, I will catch you, little brat. And when I do, you'll never see the light of day ever again! (grabs "Wet Floor" sign and tosses it at Stewie)

Stewie (dodges, causing the "Wet Floor" sign to hit the wall instead): HA-HA! You missed!

 _(At that point, a patient room service waiter turns to the right into the same hallway where the action is taking place. He doesn't notice neither Stewie or Professor Poopypants as he runs down the hallway…)_

Stewie (bumps into patient room service waiter, causing him to fall onto the floor, spilling all of the food and drink onto the floor in the process): HEY! Watch, where you're going! I'm trying to run, here! (runs down the hallway to the left)

Patient room service waiter: HEY! (gets up) You're the one that has to watch where you're going! (wipes food pieces off his pants) SOMEONE has to pick this up off the floor and it's NOT going to be me! (looks over and sees Professor Poopypants running down the hall towards him) HEY, YOU!

Professor Poopypants (stops running): Yes?

Patient room service waiter: Are you chasing after a little boy by any chance?

Professor Poopypants (nervously tugs on his shirt collar): Um…yes…

Patient room service waiter: Well, because of you, he caused me to spill this patient's food and drink over all over the floor. (points to mess on the floor) You must clean this all up, right now! The little boy ran off, so YOU'LL have to be the one to pick it up!

Professor Poopypants: WHAT?! No way!

Patient room service waiter (folds arms): Well, SOMEONE has to pick up this mess. And its NOT going to be me!

Professor Poopypants (pulls out handgun): Uh, I don't think so. (clocks gun)

Patient room service waiter (eyes widen): Oh shit…

Professor Poopypants (fires gun, shooting the room service waiter in the chest, killing him instantly): Goodbye, Mr. Know-It-All! (laughs) Now, to capture that little brat! (drops gun onto the floor and runs down the hallway to the right, going after Stewie) Oh little baby, where are you? Come out, come out, wherever you are!

Stewie (runs through doors of an empty operating room): Come and get me, you shitty man! (closes doors)

Professor Poopypants (sees Stewie run through doors and runs toward the doors): AHAH, I got you, now! (kicks open doors and runs in, as Stewie hides behind operating room table) Now, come on out so I can kill you!

Stewie (shivering behind the operating room table, whispering): I got to find a way out of this place! (looks around, seeing a heart monitor system, an anesthesia machine, several metal tanks of oxygen, a cabinet of medicines, and several trays of metal operating instruments) Well, at least I get to see what an operating room looks like.

Professor Poopypants (suddenly appears in front of Stewie, showing an evil grin): Hello there, little brat! I was looking all over the place for you! (laughs and pulls out sharp scalpel) I think it's time for this baby's tonsillectomy! (raises scalpel above his head) IT'S THROAT-CUTTING TIME! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHA!

Stewie (grabs oxygen tank near him): Not today! (lifts tank over his head and "WHAM!", tosses the tank at Professor Poopypants, hitting him on the head very hard, knocking him backwards onto the floor)

Professor Poopypants (drops scalpel and holds head in pain): AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH! OOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWW! THAT REALLLY HURTS! OH MY GOSH! WHY DID YOU DO THAT?! That was a freaking METAL OXYGEN TANK for gosh sake! OOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWW! MY HEAD! OOOOOOWWWWWWWWW!

Stewie: Well, that's what you get for messing with me, you piece of shit! (gets up, jumps onto operating table, unlocks the wheels, kicks another sturdy oxygen tank, and rolls himself out of the operating room, down a long hallway) SO LONG, PIECE OF SHIT!

Professor Poopypants (gets up and face reddens): THAT WAS A BIG MISTAKE TO MAKE! (runs after Stewie, makes a flying leap, and lands on top of the fast-moving operating table) AH-AH! Here's Professor Poopypants!

Stewie (turns around as the operating room table speeds faster and faster down the hallway): You again!? (pulls out knife) It's time for me to slit YOUR throat now! (swings knife at Professor Poopypants's throat)

Professor Poopypants (dodges knife blade and does a roundhouse kick, knocking the knife out of Stewie's hands): HAHA! Now, you have no knife! (laughs)

Stewie (grabs Professor Poopypants by the neck and tries to choke him): Oh, I got you know! Surrender!

Professor Poopypants: I…wouldn't…do…that…if…I…were…you…(points to what's at the end of the hallway)

Stewie (glares): Oh really? And why's that? (turns around and sees a pane of glass at the end of the hallway) Holy shit… (let's go of Professor Poopypants's throat)

Professor Poopypants (laughs): That glass is thick if I'm not mistken. A simple table like this can't break through it. The minute we hit the glass, we'll stop moving, and then I can finally kill you! (laughs)

Stewie (grins): Or WILL we stop?! (pulls out a hammer) I think its time to get SMASHING!

Professor Poopypants (gasps): NO! PLEASE, NO! NOT THAT!

Stewie (grins): Yes, Professor Poopypants, THAT! (stands up at the front edge of the operating room table)

Professor Poopypants: No, please! Anything but that!

Stewie: Too late! (tosses hammer at the window, smashing it in the process) It's time to FALL! (laughs)

 _(The operating room table reaches the end of the hallway, causing it to flip over, and fall out the window, 34 stories down, and "PLOP!", land in a manmade shallow lake al the very bottom. Stewie falls down the 34 stories, but Professor Poopypants holds on to a large piece of glass at the bottom off the windowsill, holding on for his dear life…)_

Stewie (falling towards the manmade lake): AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! (lands in the manmade lake) Am…am…I still alive?! (lifts head up and looks around) YES! I DID IT! (sits up) I SURVIVED THE FALL!

 _(Scene shows Professor Poopypants still holding onto the piece of glass. Suddenly, "SNAP!", it breaks, sending Professor Poopypants falling all the way down towards the lake, too…)_

Professor Poopypants (falling towards the manmade lake): AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! (lands in the manmande lake) Wait…I'm not dead? (gets up and looks around) YES! VICTORY IS MINE! I'm still alive! HORRAY FOR PROFESSOR POOPYPANTS!

Stewie (suddenly grabs Professor Poopypants in a chokehold and makes him fall backwards onto the floor): TIME TO DIE, MAN! (chokes him hard) Any last words?!

Professor Poopypants (struggling to breathe): Yes…I…do…have…some…last…words…

Stewie (glares): Alright, what are they?! (chokes Professor Poopypants harder than before)

Professor Poopypants: They…are…THIS! (stomps on Stewie's right foot, causing him to let go of Professor Poopypants)

Stewie: OW! (let's go of Professor Poopypants in pain) OW, MY FUCKING FOOT! (falls backwards out of the edge of the lake) That's you, you drew the line (pulls out sword) Time to lose your head! (swings head at Professor Poopypants, managing to cut him in the left arm)

Professor Poopypants (falls backwards out of the edge of the lake in pain, grabbing his bleeding left arm with his right hand): AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH! (gets up very quickly) YOU CUT MY ARM!

Stewie: No shit, Sherlock! It seems that Mr. Obvious is right on time today. (looks over to his left and sees a hospital golf cart) Got to go! Bye! (runs off and heads towards the golf cart) You can't catch me while I'm on a golf card! (jump on, turns the key, and speeds away from the area surrounding the back of the hospital building)

Professor Poopypants (gets up as the bleeding on his left arm slowly stops): Ugh, this kid is DRIVING ME CRAZY TODAY! And now, HE'S GETTING AWAY! (gets out remote control) Well, thankfully, I have ANOTHER invention that can stop him! (presses red button on remote)

 _(Scene cuts to Stewie Griffin speeding down the road on the stolen golf cart, driving past several random cars, trucks, buses, taxicabs, and other vehicles as he does…)_

Stewie (stops at a red light) Man, that guy back there was such an evil asshole. But, now that he's taken care of, I can continue my day like that whole thing never happened. (smiles) Hmmm, I wonder what's on the radio…(turns on radio knob)

 _(The radio begins to play the extended version of the theme song for "Sponegbob Squrepants"…)_

Stewie (smiles): Ah, perfect! I love "Spongebob Squrepants"! (hums to tune of song as it plays over the radio) Man, I wish I could live in a pineapple under the sea!

 _(Suddenly, the entire ground begins to vibrate. Stewie looks behind him and sees Professor Poopypants inside his massive invention called the, "Gerbil-Jogger 2000", chasing after him…)_

Professor Poopypants: Hello again, little child! (grins evilly) Ready to die today!? Well, if not, TOO BAD! (stops robotic foot at Stewie)

Stewie: HOLY SHIT! (turns off radio) Well, you'll have to CATCH ME FIRST! (slams foot down on the gas pedal and speeds off, running the red right, and speeding past several cars, buses, trucks, and other random vehicles)

Professor Poopypants (grins): Oh, I WILL! (pulls lever, allowing the "Gerbil-Jogger 2000" to chase after Stewie) Once I catch you, I'll simply kill you right on the spot! I won't even need to perform painful tests on you anymore. Oh no, not after all that you DID TO ME! (tries to grab Stewie with a robotic arm, but misses as Stewie makes a sharp right turn)

Stewie: You missed me! You missed me! (laughs and turns to the left) Now, you got to kiss me! (laughs) Man, you're such a looser! (dodges a group of random cyclists)

Professor Poopypants (turns to the left and chases after Stewie again): NO ONE ESCAPES MY CLUTCHES! (runs over several random stores, crushing them to rubble) No one escapes PROFESSOR POOPYPANTS! (laughs and jumps over a random highway overpass bridge)

Stewie (turns to the right, suddenly seeing a random "Starbucks" coffee shop in front of him): Oh shit…(closes eyes) Here we go…

 _(Stewie speeds through the parking lot, nearly knocking over a random family. Stewie then crashes through the glass windows of the coffee shop, knocking over several empty tables and chairs in the process. The golf cart then stops, as the electrical system got damaged during the crash. All off the customers and coffee shop employees gasps at the sight of the golf cart and Stewie. Stewie opens his eyes, jumps out of the golf cart, and pulls out a Tommy gun…)_

Stewie: All of you better scram or I'LL FUCKING KILL ALL OF YOU! (clocks gun) NOW!

 _(All of the scared coffee shop employees and customers scream in terror, and run off, escaping the coffee shop through the massive hole and front door at the front of the coffee shop…)_

Stewie (fires Tommy gun as the coffee shop employees and customers flee the scene): HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! YES, I SURVIVED! (puts Tommy gun away) And the best part is, there's no crazy man with a funny name in sight.

 _(Suddenly, the entire roof of the "Starbucks" coffee shop gets ripped off and tossed away by the robotic arms of the "Gerbil-Jogger 2000". Professor Poopypants grins and reaches for Stewie with both robotic arms…)_

Professor Poopypants: I GOT YOU NOW, LITTLE BRAT! (reaches for Stewie with the invention's robotic arms)

Stewie (jumps over the service counter): I got to stop that machine! (notices hose connected to a tap water faucet) I GOT IT! (grabs nose nozzle and turns on water faucet) Hey Poopypants, I got a surprise for you! (jumps on top of the service counter and holds up hose with a high-pressure stream of water) EAT THIS! (sprays water onto the chest of the "Gerbil-Jogger 2000", suddenly causing the giant invention to short out, as the water seeped into the machine via tiny openings in the chest) Oh, I guess you hate water? WELL, TOO BAD! (laughs)

 _(The giant "Gerbil-Jogger 2000" falls over, destroying the front wall of the "Starbucks" coffee shop. The glass dome of the invention smashes to piece, causing Professor Poopypants to fall out of it, landing on the floor off the coffee shop…)_

Professor Poopypants (gets up, face reddens, and steam pours out of his ears): Little kid, you're going to pay the price for ALL of the pain and misery you caused me! (notices sharp knife on table nearby) And I think I know just the way to MAKE YOU PAY! (grabs knife, jumps onto the service counter, and charges toward Stewie) TIME TO DIE! (swings knife at Stewie)

Stewie (pulls out a katana and blocks Professor Poopypants's knife): I'm sorry, but I think YOU'RE going to die today!

Professor Poopypants (swings knife again): Oh yeah?! We'll see about that!

 _(Stewie and Professor Poopypants keep on fighting each other with their sharp weapons, like how pirate sword fights play out. Suddenly, after 50 seconds of fighting, "CLINK!", Stewie's katana slices Professor Poopypants's knife in half…)_

Professor Poopypants (gasps): WHAT THE!?

Stewie (laughs): I win and you lose! (tosses katana at Professor Poopypants, missing him in the process) Ugh! Just die, already! (jumps behind the service counter and notices coffee maker and heater machine) Hmmm…(runs toward coffee machine and pressed button marked, "Coffee Heater") Hehehehe…(notices Professor Poopypants approach him angrily) Uh oh…uh…hey Mr. Professor Poopypants, I got a science question for you before you kill me! (shivers)

Professor Poopypants (rubs chin and looks to the right for a moment): Hmm…well, I guess so…very well, what's the question? I know ALL about science!

Stewie (grins): Well, my question is…how hot can coffee get?

Professor Poopypants (looks toward Stewie): Well, in a coffee machine, I guess it can go up to 90 degrees Fahrenheit. Why do you ask? Is it because we're in a coffee shop?

Stewie (grins): No. (reaches for now-hot coffee holder cup and grabs it) It's because of…THIS! (sprays very hot coffee at Professor Poopypants, hitting him in the face)

Professor Poopypants (falls over backwards onto the floor, covering his face in pain): AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! IT BURNS! AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH! THAT COFFEE MUST BE 190 DEGREES FAHRENHEIT, YOU MORON! AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! IT HURTS!

Stewie (laughs and drops coffee holder cup): HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I burned your face!

Professor Poopypants (gets up and grabs multiple knifes from the service counter): NO ONE BURNS MY FACE! (tosses all sharp knifes at Stewie, one by one)

Stewie (dodges all knives): Dude, you might as well stop throwing projectiles at me of you're going to keep missing. (laughs and escapes through back door)

Professor Poopypants (runs after Stewie): GET BACK HERE, YOU LITTLE BABY!

Stewie (runs through alleyway and sees another random car diving by): Perfect! It looks like I got myself another ride! (runs in front of car and pulls out handgun) STOP THAT CAR!

 _(The driver, who happens to me Ms. Ribble, a teacher from "Jerome Horwitz Elementary", stops the car so fast and ends up 2 inches away from Stewie. She opens the window and looks out…)_

Ms. Ribble: Hey kid, get out of the road!

Stewie (fires handgun, hitting the left rear-view mirror): SHUT UP AND GET OUT OF THE CAR!

Ms. Ribble (screams, opens car down, and steps out, holding her arms above her head): Okay! Okay! I'm out! Please don't shoot me!

Stewie (grins and puts gun away): Thank you, ma'am. (runs up to car door, jumps inside, and closes door) For that, you won't get shot. (speeds off, running another red light)

Professor Poopypants (runs up to Ms. Ribble as Stewie drives away): MA'AM! MA'AM! (pants) Where…is…the…little…baby…in…red…overalls?

Ms. Ribble (points to the right): He went that way.

Professor Poopypants (smiles): Thank you. (runs off, noticing a parked motorcycle on the curb, with the keys still in the ignition) Now THAT'S A COOL RIDE! (jumps on motorcycle and speeds away, going after Stewie)

 _(At that point, a random teenage boy walks out of a store, seeing Professor Poopypants steal his motorcycle…)_

Teenage boy: HEY! (runs over to the curb) THAT'S MY MOTORCYCLE!

Professor Poopypants (looks behind him): Sorry, but it's for a good cause! I'll return it later, okay? (looks forward again, increasing the speed of the motorcycle)

 _(The scene cuts to Stewie, speeding through a random neighborhood. Suddenly, a random car approaches Stewie from in front of him…)_

Stewie: HOLY SHIT! (makes a sharp turn to the left, causing him to crash through a fence of a backyard) Well, it looks like I'll have to cut THROUGH the yards! (speeds through random backyards, smashing through wooden and/or chain-link fences) YIPEE! Man, this is just like riding a horse in a rodeo! (crashes through several more backyards

 _(Scene cuts to a random backyard that happens to belong to George Beard and his family. George and his friend, Harold Hutchins, are playing football in the backyard, tossing a football back and forth…)_

George (catches football and tosses it back to Harold): Man, this is fun!

Harold (catches football and tosses it back to George): Yeah, it really is. Hey, I have a new idea for a new "Captain Underpants" comic!

George (catches football): Really? Cool! What is the idea?

Harold: "Captain Underpants and the Attack of the Monster Footballs"! Great name, huh?

George (tosses football back to Harold): Yeah, that's a great name. Let's play one more round of football and then get to work on it!

Harold (catches football): Alright. That's a good idea!

 _(Stewie suddenly crashes through the fence surrounding George's family's backyard, and speeds through the backyard, flattening flowerbeds, knocking over trashcans, and creating tire tracks in the grass in the process. As Stewie drives through more backyards, George and Harold watch the whole event, shocked by what they have just seen…)_

George: What the heck?!

Harold: Was that a…BABY driving a CAR?!

George (drops football): Yes…(gulps) it was.

Harold: Man, now that's something you don't see every day…

Goerge: Man, my mom is going to FREAK OUT when she sees this after work!

Harold: Don't worry. It CANNOT get any worse!

 _(Professor Poopypants suddenly speeds into the backyard, stopping in his tracks as he sees George and Harold, who see him, fall over after trying to run, and freak out…)_

George: P-P-P-P-P-P-Professor Poopypants! (screams in fear)

Harold: Please don't hurt us! (shivers in hear) We're sorry!

Profressor Poopypants (steps off motorcycle): Relax, you brats! I'm not here to deal with you! I'm just here to catch that baby and kill it!

Harold: K-k-k-kill it?! (shivers)

Professor Poopypants: SHUT UP! (grins evilly) Now, to avoid getting hurt with my thrust for revenge, tell me which way that baby went!

George and Harold (in unison, pointing to the right): HE WENT THAT WAY! (shivers in fear)

Professor Poopypants (grins): Thank you, kids. (steps back on bike) I'll be back to deal with you two later! (laughs and speeds off through the path of damage that Stewie had caused)

 _(Scene cuts to Stewie Griffin driving the car out of the residential area of town, and through a small playground. He then turns to the left after dodging a group of random police officers on lunch break. Steiwe then notices the front double doors of a school called "Jerome Horwitz Elementary School"…)_

Stewie (grins): Hmmm…(looks behind him and then forward again): I guess since that idiotic man isn't following me, I guess can cause some mayhem! (speeds towards the school doors very fast) IT'S MAYHEM TIME!

 _(Stewie crashes through the doors of the school, breaking them to pieces. He then speeds down the hallway, scaring several students, teachers, and other staff members, who all dodge and jump out of the way in terror. Stewie laughs with delight as he makes a left turn…)_

Stewie (notices and open door in the hallway that leads to the main office): Hmmm, I wonder what's in here. (stop car and opens up window)

 _(Stewie sees a female office worker on the telephone, on hold, waiting for someone from the other end to talk to her. As she was still on hold, background music was playing in the background…_

Stewie: On hold?

Female officer worker (nods in reply)

Stewie: Ugh, I hate when that happens. Well, I hope that ends well for you. (closes window and continues speeding down the hallway) HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I love causing trouble! Nothing can stop me now and ruin this moment!

 _(Professor Poopypants suddenly speeds in through the now-smashed doors and laughs evilly…)_

Professor Poopypants: But I can! (laughs) Surrender, little brat! (increases speed of motorcycle)

Stewie (looks in rear-view mirror): Oh crap! This is not good! (makes a sharp left turn, speeding towards one of the 2 pairs of double doors of the school's library) Uh oh…

 _(Stewie crashes through the library doors, ripping them off their hinges. He knocks over several bookshelves in the center sections of the school library, causing hundreds of varieties of books fall onto the floor, creating a big mess. All of the students inside, except for one, run out in fear, as well as the librarian…)_

Stewie (turns off car's ignition and opens car door): That…was…AWESONE! (jumps out of car) But now, this is not a good time.

Professor Poopypants (speeds inside with motorcycle): NO KIDDING, LITTLE BOY! (stops bike and steps off) So, you think you can hide in a school to escape my clutches?! (pulls out double-bladed axe) I don't think so! (evilly grins and swings axe at Stewie)

Stewie (dodges blade and pulls out harpoon gun): DIE! (fires harpoon, knocking the axe out of Professor Poopypant's hand)

Professor Poopypants (pulls out spiky mace): No…YOU DIE! (swings mace at Stewie)

Stewie (dodges, causing the mace to hit a large bookcase instead, knocking it over, breaking it, and causing several more books to fall onto the floor) HAHA! MISSED! (dodges mace as Professor Poopypants swings it again) Jeez man, you can't hit a child!? No wonder you're a looser…

Professor Poopypants (pulls out running chainsaw): I'm…not…a…LOOSER! (charges toward Stewie with the chainsaw)

 _(A few feet away from the battle area, a nerdy kid named Melvin Sneedly is standing in front of the librarian's desk, stamping some date information on the last pages of several books. He is wearing headphones and listening to classical music on an "MP3" player. He doesn't notice anything going on behind him. But he leaves his wallet on the desk…)_

Melvin (stamps the last page of the last book): Ah, all finished. Nothing like a nice day of library volunteering after lunch. (grabs two books he checked out) Well, I better get to math class. I LOVE studying ratios and the order of operations!

 _(Melvin exits the school library through the unaffected pair of double doors, still not noticing anything going on)_

Stewie (jumps over Professor Poopypant's head, doing a backflip mid-air, landing on a middle shelf of a bookcase behind him) HIYA! (pulls out whip and snaps it at Professor Poopypants, hitting him on the neck and causing him to drop his chainsaw)

Professor Poopypants (turns around) OW! (grabs a heavy 5th grade mathematics textbook) Oh, I think it's MATH TIME! (tosses book at Stewie)

Stewie (dodges book): Missed me!

Professor Poopypants (grabs 4th grade science textbook): Dodge THIS! (tosses book at Stewie)

Stewie (does another flip mid-air and jumps onto the floor): Missed again! (pulls out grenade and yanks out pin) EXPLOSION TIME! (tosses grenade at Profressor Poopypants, who dodges, causing the grenade to hit another bookcase, exploding, and causing the bookcase to topple over onto Professor Poopypants) HAHAHAHAHAHA!

Professor Poopypants (punches large hole in bookcase and climbs out, holding a stick of dynamite) Oh, so you think you can cause an explosion? (pulls out a lighter and lights the stick of dynamite) Well, TAKE THIS! (tosses stick of dynamite at Stewie)

Stewie (dodges stick, allowing he stick of dynamite to hit a nearby wall instead): MISSED ME AGAIN, PIECE OF SHIT!

 _(The stick of dynamite explodes, creating a hole in the wall…)_

Professor Poopypants (pulls out another stick of dynamite): TIME TO DIE, LITTLE BABY! (pulls out another stick of dynamite, lights it up, and tosses it at Stewie, which lands near Stewie's feet)

Stewie (sees its 1 second away from explosion and throwing it is not possible): Oh shit…

 _("KABOOM!", the stick of dynamite explodes, throwing Stewie across the room, and onto a pile of books and broken pieces of a bookcase…)_

Stewie (groans in pain): Oh fuck, this is not good. (notices a handgun of his gun a few feet away from him) Must…grab…gun…(reaches for gun)

 _(Suddenly, Professor Poopypants holds Stewie down with one of his feet. He looks down at a now bruised and cut Stewie Griffin, and grins evilly…)_

Professor Poopypants: Well, well, well…look at what we have here. (reaches for double-bladed axe) It seems that this little baby is going to pay the ultimate price for messing with me, Professor Pee-Pee Diarrheastein Poopypants! (grabs double-bladed axe and lifts Stewie off the ground with his other hand. (puts blade close to Stewie's neck) Well little baby, its time to die. (laughs)

Stewie: NOT TODAY! (bites Professor Poopypants on his left hand)

Professor Poopypants (let's go of Stewie in pain, drops axe, and falls backward on his butt): YYYYEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWW! (rubs hand) You…you….you bit me!

Stewie (grins): I know…(pulls out a running chainsaw) But that was just the beginning…OF YOUR DEATH!

Professor Poopypants: No, wait! Please, don't kill me! (tries to back away) We can talk about this, okay!?

Stewie: Hmmm, let me think…NO! (swings chainsaw at Professor Poopypants, hitting him in the stomach, cutting him in half, and causing blood and multiple internal oragans to spew all over the room...)

Professor Poopypants (in throbbing pain as he's cut in half): AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! (blood pours out of his mouth) AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! (closes eyes and dies)

Stewie (turns off chainsaw and puts it away): YES! I DID IT! (dances all around the room) YIPEE! YAHOO! HORRAY! YEAH! YAY! WHOHOOOOOOO! (sees open window) Now, I better get out of here before the police show up! (jumps out the window and runs off, heading back to his house)

 _(Suddenly, at that very moment, Melvin Sneedly walks back into the library to get his wallet, but as he grabs it, he suddenly sees the dead body of Professor Poopypants, internal organs, books, broken bookcases, and blood all over the room…)_

Melvin (sees dead body and gasps) What the?! (drops wallet onto the floor) AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH (runs out of the room) HELP! WE NEED HELP! THERE'S A DEAD BODY IN THE LIBRARY! IS MR. KRUP HERE?! MR. KRUP! MR. KRUP! MR. KRUP! (runs down the hallway and runs toward the office)

 **KO!**

Boomstick: Wiz…that…was…AWESOME! (jumps out of chair) STEWIE BEAT AN EVIL SCIENTIST! HIGH-FIVE, STEWIE! (dances around the room with joy)

Wiz (sighs): Boomstick, please relax. Anyways folks, you just witness the LONGEST "Death Battle" to ever take place! So, as you can see, both Stewie and Professor Poopypants were evenly skilled in combat, could both drive a vehicle very fast, and both could use weapons with little to no struggle!

Boomstick (relaxes and sits back down in his seat): But despite the skill of an evil scientist, Professor Poopypants could NOT beat Stewie, as he's already failed MANY evil schemes in the past, beaten by 2 kids and man flying around, wearing nothing but unperpants. Stewie however, has NEVER been defeated, and he's always been a real winner when it comes to these battles to the death. Not ONCE has he EVER been defeated. And Professor Poopypant's adventures, while built with good intentions, were NOT prepared for fighting against Stewie's skills and abilities.

Wiz: Stewie's skills were better than Professor Poopypants's, as he's more skilled than him, and is a person that's hard to beat. Stewie can also take quite a punch and still SURVIVE, like that time he fought that girl, Penelope.

Boomstick: And now, George and Harold can relax, knowing that Professor Pee-Pee Diarrheastein Poopypants is dead and burning in Hell for all that he's done in the past. And now, everyone in the city can all sleep soundly, knowing that the evil scientist is dead!

Wiz: In conclusion of our longest "Death Battle" ever, the winner is Stewie Griffin.

Boomstick: Thank you all for watching, and we'll see you next time on "Death Battle"!

Wiz: This is Wiz…

Boomstick: And this is Boomstick, signing off!

 **THE END!**

 **Well, it looks like Stewie Griffin triumphs again! And this time, the opponent DESERVED to die! Professor Poopypants shouldn't have messee with Stewie, but now, he's dead, burning in Hell, and paying the price for doing so. Also, if you haven't seen the "Captain Underpants" movie yet, I would highly recommend doing so, as the film is AMAZING in my opinion. It should be seen by as many people as possible before it's out of theaters and on its way to DVD release. But until then, this episode of Season 2 should entertain out all until that day comes. Well, what are we waiting for? Let's all move on over to Episode 9 of Season 2 of this very epic and action-packed miniseries...**


	9. Stewie Griffin VS Boss Baby

**Well everyone, I'm back. Yep, I'm back once again with Episode 9 of Season 2 of this brand new action-packed and very epic miniseries of 2017. In this episode, Stewie Griffin will be fighting some one his own age...the Boss Baby from the 2017 "DreamWorks" animated movie of the same name. What will happen in this "Death Battle"? Well, you'll just have to read and find out for yourself. I'm not going to spoil it all for you now, well, what are we all waiting for? Let's begin Season 2, Episode 8 of this brand new, very epic, and action-packed miniseries...**

Wiz: Babies. Theyre so cute, tiny, and sometimes loud and even very messy. But sometimes...they want to kill each other.

Boomstick: Stewie Griffin, everyone's favorite homicidal baby with the intelligence of a criminal.

Wiz: And Professor Poopypants, the evil scientist with the name that seems like it belongs to a circus clown.

Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick!

Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a "Death Battle".

 **Introduction to Stewie Griffin:**

Boomstick: Ah, good old Stewie Griffin. You never know what'll happen when messing with this kid! Needless to say, he LOVES fighting in these "Death Battles" and this is nineteenth battle to the death…

Wiz: We already introduced Stewie Griffin in the last season of "Death Battle", as well as every episode of this second season, but we still have to do it again due to the rules of "Death Battle".

Boomstick: To make it short and sweet on my part, Stewie Griffin is a homicidal baby that wants complete world domination!

Wiz: This one-year-old is not meant to be messed with. If you do mess with him, he'll probably kill you. Not joking, he WILL kill you if provoked.

Boomstick: Stewie Griffin is the youngest member of the Griffin family, but don't yet his young appearance fool you. He's a damn psychopath!

Wiz: Born on June 30 1999, Stewie Griffin has a very sophisticated psyche and is able to speak fluently in an upper-class English accent. When he was born, his birth doctor found a map of Europe with plans to bomb its capitals inside Lois, his mother.

Boomstick: From that day on, he was shown not to be a normal kid, but a kid with the mind of a criminal. His weapon arsenal is full of classic weapons. These weapons include a machine gun, a tommy gun, a chainsaw, a machete, a flame thrower, a rocket launcher, a crossbow, a laser gun, a few hand grenades, a handgun, and even a harpoon gun. This is one of the reasons you should think twice about messing with Stewie!

Wiz: Not to mention his abilities! He can run fast, jump high, trick his enemies, punch hard, kick hard, and even bite hard. He can yell or curse up a storm, and he can even invent things.

Boomstick: Over the years of the "Family Guy" show, Stewie has invented many futuristic inventions, such as a mind controlling device, a carbonite freeze gun, a hypnotic control device, a hovering drill machine, a teleporter device, a multiverse traveler, a Peter-Bot, a clone machine, rocket skis, a weather device, and even a God-damn time machine! Wow, this is one badass little kid.

Wiz: His inventions are very cool and technologically advanced, and he uses them multiple times. However, due to the rules of "Death Battle", Stewie can't use his time machine. But he can use any of his other inventions.

Boomstick: This all proves one thing…if you want to bully a kid, please make sure that kid is not Stewie.

Wiz: However, he's not PERFECT. When his friend Brian gets into a dangerous situation, its been shown since Stewie and Brain are friends, Stewie CAN get distracted from any of his battles to help save Brian.

Boomstick: Wait, what?! Why on Earth does he care so much at Brian?

Wiz: Well, in one episode, he mentions that because of neglect from Peter, his father, he sees Brain as a fatherly figure, more than Peter. So, because of this, Stewie can get emotional and weak sometimes.

Boomstick: But despite this, Stewie Griffin is still one badass kid!

 **Introduction to Boss Baby:**

Boomstick: Ah, babies. Little bundles of joy, they are. They giggle, they smile, and they're very easy to care for. From changing diapers, to hand-feeding them, the simple job to taking care of a baby is one to be enjoyed...that is, unless your baby is the Boss Baby.

Wiz: Boss Baby is a most unusual baby. He wears a black suit, carries a brown briefcase, and is very different that most babies out there. The Boss Baby was one of the babies created at the "Baby Corp" company, the place where all babies in the world were born from. However during a sorting process, the machine failed to tickle him and he was sorted into the "management" section instead of "family" section, making him a boss baby. management" section instead of family section, making him a boss baby. He was then given a suit along with equipment and trained to work at the company. During this time, he came to idolize the Super Colossal Big Fat Boss Baby, once a legendary baby who was bestowed the company's highest position and was given an exclusive office.

Boomstick: After working there for an undetermined amount of time, he became known as the Boss Baby and was sent on a mission by his superior, the Big Boss Baby, to find out why humans adore puppies more than babies. He accomplished this goal, along with his older "brother", Timothy Templeton, and was given his dream promotion, as well as the "corner office" assigned to him. But even though he quit at the end of the movie to be a family baby full-time, this "Death Battle", will NOT take place AFTER the events of the movie to avoid continuity issues.

Wiz: Well, now that we talked about his backstory, let's talk about his abilities. The Boss Baby cam run fast, jump high, dodge projectiles, karate attack his enemies, and even drive a toy car very fast. Some of his tools include an extendable metal rod, an unlimited amount of cash to bribe people that gets in his way, a toy telephone to call other babies for backup, and even a special milk or "baby formula" that, when drunken, allows the baby to act and talk like an adult boss.

Boomstick: So, a formula let's the Boss Baby do all this? Man, I GOT to get some of that milk.

Wiz (sighs): Boomstick, that formula is for babies only. You're not getting any of that formula any time soon.

Boomstick: Aw man! Wiz, you're such a party pooper! (sighs) Back to the subject, it seems that NOTHING can stop this baby in battle!

Wiz: Actually, there is ONE flaw with Boss Baby...

Boomstick: And that is...?

Wiz: You see, in order to keep these abilities, the Boss Baby must drink his special formula after a certain period of time. If he doesn't, he'll revert back to and start acting like a non-boss, normal baby. So, without the formula, he can't fight or event talk in a "Death Battle" like the one taking place today.

Boomstick: That's it? That's the weakness?! Man, this baby better drink up today as Stewie will do whatever it takes to win! Hey Wiz, it's time for the main "Death Battle", isn't it?

Wiz: Yes Boomstick, it's time. Let's begin this babies-only "Death Battle"!

 **And now, the actual battle to the death...**

 _(The scene begins with Stewie riding a new rocket-powered bike through the city. He then stops at a local park and plays for a while. Afterwards, an hour passes, and Stewie gets thirsty...)_

Stewie: Man, I made so thirsty, I can breastfeed off of Selena Gomez...

 _(Meanwhile, a few feet away, the Boss Baby was drinking his bottle of milk formula to keep talking and acting like an adult boss...)_

Boss Baby: Ah, nothing like a nice bottle of formula while playing at a park. (sucks on bottle some more) Nothing can ruin this moment for me...

 _(The scene cuts back to Stewie, who turns and notices the Boss Baby drinking his milk bottle...)_

Stewie: Hmm, what have we here? (grins) Ah, milk. Perfect for stealing and drinking for myself. (hops back onto bike and turns it on) But I can't simply snatch it from it. I'll be too easy for him to snatch it back. Luckily, speeding past him and stealing it will work just fine! (speed past Boss Baby on he bike, snatching the bottle of milk formula as he does)

Boss Baby (looks up in shock): What the?! HEY! THAT'S MY MILK! (stands up) COME BACK HERE AND GIVE IT BACK!

Stewie (looks back at Boss Baby as he speeds away): I don't think so! (laughs and looks forward again)

Boss Baby (holds up fist): No one steals my milk! (walks offscreen to get his toy police car)

Stewie (speeds down the road and drinks the milk): Ah, its like taking candy from a baby...okay, this is official. This is the fourth time I've said this joke. And now, I have a feeling it's getting old and unfunny. Oh, fuck it. At least I have something to drink. (turns left and stops at red light) I think I'll go get myself some ice cream as a treat to all of the murders I did. (light turns green and Stewie continues speeding down the road)

 _(Suddenly, the Boss Baby blocks Stewie's way in a toy police car...)_

Stewie (stops bike in shock): What the duce?!

Boss Baby (folds arms): Trying to steal from an unborn baby executive? (laughs) Nice try but no one steals from me...

Stewie (glares): Well, I still have the milk in my hands, so, unless you want to die a painful death today, I suggest you get the Hell out of my face! (reaches behind his back) So, go away or else...

Boss Baby (laughs): Or else, what? (grins)

Stewie (pulls out machine gun): Or else THIS! (clocks gun)

Boss Baby (shocked): Oh shit...

 **FIGHT!**

Boss Baby (screams and speeds away): AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH! HELP ME!

Stewie (runs after Boss Baby): Get back here, you little shit! (fires machine gun)

Boss Baby (swerves toy police car side-to-side, making the bullets hit it but bounce off): HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! This toy car of mine is plastic! You can't shoot it!

Stewie (tosses machine gun to the side and pulls out flamethrower): Well, I'll BURN YOU INSTEAD! (laughs and fires flamethrower at toy car)

Boss Baby: Oh crap...

Stewie (fires flamethrower and melts the car very fast): HAHA! Now, you have no car!

Boss Baby (jumps out of melting car and gets in defensive stance, holding fists): Oh yeah?! That won't stop me from kicking your butt!

Stewie (drops flamethrower and tackles Boss Baby to the floor): Oh yeah?! (beings punching Boss Baby all over his face and body, bruising him badly): HAHA! TAKE THAT! AND THAT! FEEL THE PAIN, YOU LITTLE SHIT! PAIN! PAIN! PAIN! PAIN! PAIN! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! YOU LIKE THAT?! HUH!? DO YOU LIKE THAT!? LITTLE SHIT!

Boss Baby (struggles to fight back but to no avail): OW! OW! OW! OUCH! OUCH! OUCH! STOP IT! AAAHHH! STOP IT, PLEASE! OUCH! OW! OW, THAT HURTS! PLEASE, STOP HURTING ME!

Stewie (grabs Boss Baby in a chokehold): Having fun now, you little baby of shit?!(chokes Boss Baby hard)

Boss Baby (struggles for air): Please...stop...this...now...I...can't...breathe...at...all...

Stewie: Oh, what's wrong? Poor baby can't breathe!? (laughs) Well, TOO BAD! (tightens his childhood)

Boss Baby: Must...not...surrender! (stomps on Stewie's foot hard, making him let go)

Stewie: OW! Alright, that's it! (pulls out handgun) You're fucking toast, now! No more Mr. Nice Baby! (fires handgun)

Boss Baby (dodges bullets and runs off): You'll have to catch me first!

Stewie (chases Boss Baby): You'll regret running from me, you little shit!

Boss Baby (runs towards nearby wooden tool shed): I got to hide! (runs inside shed, slams door shut, and locks it from the inside) He'll never find me in here!

Stewie (knocks on door): Little pig, little pig, let me come in...(pulls out axe)

Boss Baby (gasps): He found my hiding spot! (leans on back of door and shivers) I got to do something before he finds a way inside! (frantically looks around)

Stewie: Not by the hair of your chinny-chin-chin? (grins) Then I'll huff, and I'll puff, and I'LL BLOW YOUR HOUSE IN! (begins chopping the door with axe) Sooner or later, I'll be in there, killing you off! (continues chopping hole in wooden door)

Boss Baby (sees window on the back of the shed): Ah, a way out! (runs to back of shed, jumps on windowsill, opens window, and climbs outside the shed) Now to teach that brat a lesson...(grins)

Stewie (manages to chop face-sized hole in the door): HERE'S STEWIE! (sees the shed is empty) What the duce?! Where is that little shit? I know he was in here! I fucking saw him go in here!

Boss Baby (tackles Stewie from behind and puts him in a chokehold): AH-HA! I got you! How do YOU like being choked!? HUH?! Do you like it!?

Stewie (struggles for air): No...I...don't! (pulls out knife and sullenly, stabs Boss Baby in his left arm)

Boss Baby (let's go of Stewie's neck in pain): AAAAHHHH! YOU STABBED ME!

Stewie: Yes! (gets up, drops knife, and pulls out shotgun) I sure did, you little shit! (fires shotgun) EAT SOME LEAD!

Boss Baby: Oh crap...(runs off)

Stewie: You're dead, now! (chases after Boss Baby while firing shotgun) No one chokes me!

Boss Baby (runs down the street, jumping over multiple cars, buses, trucks, benches, trashcans, and blue mailboxes) You'll never kill me!

Stewie (keeps chasing Boss Baby while continues firing shotgun): Oh yes, I WILL! (jumps over the same things Boss Baby is jumping over) YOU MUST DIE! (fires shotgun some more)

Boss Baby (pulls out pen): The pen is mightier than the sword! (knocks bullets out of the path) It looks like your stupid bullets can't stop me!

Stewie (drops shotgun and pulls out sword): Oh, mightier than the sword, huh?! Well, fight THIS! (swings sword at Boss Baby)

Boss Baby (blocks sword with pen several times): AH-HA! You're sword is no match for my pen! (keeps blocking sword blows)

Stewie (keeps swinging sword at Boss Baby): DIE, YOU FUCKING LITTLE SHIT! (swings sword very hard, cutting Boss Baby's pen in half)

Boss Baby (drops other half of pen and backs away): Oh poop...

Stewie (corners Boss Baby against a nearby lamppost) Any last words, little shit?

Boss Baby: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Stewie: Hmm, that's the same thing that the last person I killed said. Oh well...(stabs Boss Baby through his stomach, killing him instantly)

Boss Baby (dies and falls to ground, bleeding from his chest)

Stewie: YES! I DID IT! I SHOWED THAT BABY WHO'S BOSS! HORRAY! YES! YAHOO! YIPEE! YAAAAAAY! (walks back to the local park where his bike is) Well, time to go...(starts rocket-powered bike and speeds off)

 **KO!**

Boomstick: Woah, did you see that!? Now that's what I call the battle of the babies!

Wiz: As you can see, both babies were really skilled at combat, but Stewie's more lethal approach to fighting gave him the leg-up he needed. Stewie has had way more experience fighting opponents and other criminals, as opposed to Boss Baby who's only limited to physical fighting skills, as well as his baby keys, pen, and telephone.

Boomstick: Not to mention the fact that Stewie his more ready and alert to kill and fight people, while Boss Baby is not.

Wiz: It looks like Timothy Templeton is now a single child again...which is also a very bad thing...

Boomstick: And now, Timothy can be a happy boy without a baby to get in the way of his mother and father. We couldn't have asked for a better ending and climax than this one! Ah, babies can really fight well, can't they?

Wiz: Once again, the winner is Stewie Griffin.

Boomstick: Thanks for watching and we'll see you next time on "Death Battle"!

 **Well everyone, that's all for this 8th episode of "Death Battle: Season 2"! And the very next episode, Episode 10, is the Season 2 FINALE! HORRAY! Another season is almost over! After that battle has ended, you'll be treated to a very long list of characters, locations, and authors who reviews the story as a sort of credits page. And there is ONE FINAL season left after this one before FINALLY end my "Death Battle" series on a very high note. But for now, let's all move on to Episode 9 of Season 2 of this very epic and action-packed miniseries of 2017...**


	10. Stewie Griffin VS Numbuh 2, 3, 4, and 5

**Hello everyone, I'm back! Yep, I'm back once again with another chapter of this very epic and action-packed miniseries. In the last chapter, Stewie Griffin fought and killed off the one and only Boss Baby from the 2017 "Dreamworks" movie of the same name. In this very special chapter, Stewie Griffin shall fight off Numbuh 2, Numbuh 3, Numbuh 4, and Numbuh 5 of "Sector V" of "Codename: Kids Next Door", as this is the Season 2 finale! Yep, Season 2 is now over! I Well, what on Earth are we waiting for? Let's all begin chapter 10 of this very epic and action-packed miniseries...**

Wiz: So far, this action-packed second season of "Death Battle" has been a great one. We had some great solo villains, as well as villains who work together. And in this Season 2 finale, none of that will change on bit!

Boomstick: Stewie Griffin, everyone's favorite homicidal baby with the intelligence of a criminal.

Wiz: And Numbuh 2, Numbuh 3, Numbuh 4, and Numbuh 5, the four remaining kids of "Sector V".

Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick!

Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a "Death Battle".

 **Introduction to Stewie Griffin:**

Boomstick: Ah, good old Stewie Griffin. You never know what'll happen when messing with this kid! Needless to say, he LOVES fighting in these "Death Battles" and this is twentieth battle to the death!

Wiz: We already introduced Stewie Griffin in the last season of "Death Battle", as well as every episode of this second season, but we still have to do it again due to the rules of "Death Battle".

Boomstick: To make it short and sweet on my part, Stewie Griffin is a homicidal baby that wants complete world domination!

Wiz: This one-year-old is not meant to be messed with. If you do mess with him, he'll probably kill you. Not joking, he WILL kill you if provoked.

Boomstick: Stewie Griffin is the youngest member of the Griffin family, but don't yet his young appearance fool you. He's a damn psychopath!

Wiz: Born on June 30 1999, Stewie Griffin has a very sophisticated psyche and is able to speak fluently in an upper-class English accent. When he was born, his birth doctor found a map of Europe with plans to bomb its capitals inside Lois, his mother.

Boomstick: From that day on, he was shown not to be a normal kid, but a kid with the mind of a criminal. His weapon arsenal is full of classic weapons. These weapons include a machine gun, a tommy gun, a chainsaw, a machete, a flame thrower, a rocket launcher, a crossbow, a laser gun, a few hand grenades, a handgun, and even a harpoon gun. This is one of the reasons you should think twice about messing with Stewie!

Wiz: Not to mention his abilities! He can run fast, jump high, trick his enemies, punch hard, kick hard, and even bite hard. He can yell or curse up a storm, and he can even invent things.

Boomstick: Over the years of the "Family Guy" show, Stewie has invented many futuristic inventions, such as a mind controlling device, a carbonite freeze gun, a hypnotic control device, a hovering drill machine, a teleporter device, a multiverse traveler, a Peter-Bot, a clone machine, rocket skis, a weather device, and even a God-damn time machine! Wow, this is one badass little kid.

Wiz: His inventions are very cool and technologically advanced, and he uses them multiple times. However, due to the rules of "Death Battle", Stewie can't use his time machine. But he can use any of his other inventions.

Boomstick: This all proves one thing…if you want to bully a kid, please make sure that kid is not Stewie.

Wiz: However, he's not PERFECT. When his friend Brian gets into a dangerous situation, its been shown since Stewie and Brain are friends, Stewie CAN get distracted from any of his battles to help save Brian.

Boomstick: Wait, what?! Why on Earth does he care so much at Brian?

Wiz: Well, in one episode, he mentions that because of neglect from Peter, his father, he sees Brain as a fatherly figure, more than Peter. So, because of this, Stewie can get emotional and weak sometimes.

Boomstick: But despite this, Stewie Griffin is still one badass kid!

 **Introduction to Numbuh 2, Numbuh 3, Numbuh 4, and Numbuh 5:**

Boomstick: Hey, remember when Numbuh 1 lost his life in Season 1, Episode 1 of "Death Battle"?

Wiz: Yeah, I do. It was exciting and sad at the same time.

Boomstick: Well, get ready to rumble as Numbuh 1 MIGHT be avenged in today's "Death Battle"!

Wiz: That's right, Boomstick. And who better to do so than Numbuh 2, Numbuh 3, Numbuh 4, and Numbuh 5, also known as the remaining members of "Sector V"!

Boomstick: These four kids aren't only intelligent, but they're also active badasses. All together, they can dodge projectiles, run fast, jump high over obstacles, outsmart their enemies, escape traps from evil adults, and even talk back at most evil adults. Man, that's something I wouldn't have even done to my mom. Boy, if I did that, I wouldn't have been alive today...

Wiz: Boomstick, you must've had one strict mom...(cringes)

Boomstick: I know...stop reminding me.

Wiz: Back to the introduction, these kids are not your average kids, as they have a variety of skills that most normal children lack. Not only do that have all of those physical abilities that Boomstick just mentioned, but they also have several weapons that each individual operative of "Sector V" uses. For example, Numbuh 2 is very talented at making new "Kids Next Door" weapons to use in battles. He has a condiment gun, a laser gun and pointer, a gumball gun, and of course, a wooden spanking paddle.

Boomstick: Now, to talk about Numbuh 3. She's a HUGE FAN of Rainbow Monkeys! And I mean HUGE FAN! I'm talking, I-Would-Kill-For-Them type of fan! But we're not here to talk about her love for a Rainbow Monkeys! We're here to talk about her weapons. Her weapons include a liquid paint gun, a glitter pistol, a glue shooter, and even a marshmallow gun.

Wiz: Numbuh 4 has amazing weapons, considering the fact that he likes to fight! He has a jetpack, a mixed condiment gun, a bazooka that shoots melted chocolate, a wooden paddle spanker, and even a spitball slingshot. He also has a helmet that, once put on, and defect most weapons used by adults in a battle situation.

Boomstick: And finally, let's talk about Numbuh 5, the only GIRL and AFRICAN-AMERICAN in "Sector V"! She's a badass little girl, with a set of badass weapons! Her weapons include a hot sauce gun, a slingshot that shoots balls of silly putty, a paintball shotgun, a set of whipped cream bombs, and even some colorful smoke bombs. Man, these kids are unstoppable! I don't think I would ever tell those kids to get off my lawn any time soon!

Wiz: Well Boomstick, they CAN be stopped at times. You see, if an adult has a bigger and more powerful machine, they CAN overpower the kids of "Sector V", to the point where they're powerless unless they can be stopped at the last minute.

Boomstick: But despite that minor setback, the kids of "Sector V" are still pretty...well...badass!

 **And now, the actual battle to the death...**

( _The scene begins with Numbuh 2, Numbuh 3, Numbuh 4, and Numbuh 5 at a local cemetery, surrounding Numbuh 1's gravestone. It's the evening hours, and they're the only ones in the cemetery...)_

Numbuh 2 (drops flower bouquet on grave): Poor Numbuh 1. He was a great operative. Sadly, someone took his life...

Numbuh 3 (cries)

Numbuh 4: And it seems the killer is still at large.

Numbuh 5: And the worst part is, Numbuh 1 never got to finish his ice cream...

 _(Stewie Griffin rides up to where the kids are on his rocket-powered bicycle...)_

Stewie: Hello there, kids. I'm Stewie Griffin. Why do you all look so upset?

Numbuh 2: Our leader died. His name was Numbuh 1.

Numbuh 3 (cries): He was the best leader we ever had! (sees Stewie is a baby): Aww, what a cute little baby!

Numbuh 4: And he never got to finish his ice cream. (sniffs) I'll miss him and the way he looked cool in those sunglasses.

Numbuh 5: If only we knew who did it...we would avenge Numbuh 1 almost instantly!

Stewie: Oh, dear God, that's horrible! But I think I may be able to help you children out.

Numbuh 2 (sniffs): Really? How?

Stewie: Well, I saw who killed him!

Numbuh 3 (gasps)

Numbuh 4: Y-you did?!

Numbuh 5: Little baby, tell us who it was! I don't care if it was an evil adult or evil kid, becuase we're going to avenge him!

Stewie: Okay...(points to himself) I did it...(grins evilly)

Numbuh 2: Wait...what?!

Stewie (nods): I killed him with a chainsaw after he tried to stop me for stealing his ice cream cone. (pulls out machine gun)

Numbuh 3: Aww, the cute little baby has a toy, too!

Numbuh 4 (trembles in fear): Uh, Numbuh 3, that doesn't look like a toy gun...

Numbuh 3: Oh, why are you always so scared? That's just a toy and not at all a real gun! Why do you always assume the worse?

Stewie: Let's see about that, shall we? (fires machine gun, hitting Numbuh 3 in the chest and stomach) Take that, bitch. (laughs)

Numbuh 5 (gasps): NUMBUH 3!

Numbuh 3 (falls over and bleeds heavily from her stomach and chest): That's...not...a...toy...(coughs)

Numbuh 2: NOOOOOOOO! Kuki, please don't die! (cries)

Numbuh 4: Yeah, please don't die! I'm sorry for calling Rainbow Monkeys stupid! I really am! (tears flow down his cheeks)

 _(Numbuh 2, Numbuh 4, and Numbuh 5 all get on thier knees around Numbuh 3, as she says her final words...)_

Numbuh 3: I...never...got...the...(coughs)...chance...to...see...(coughs)...the...next...up...coming...(coughs)...rain...bow...mon...(coughs)...key...movie! (coughs and gasps) Goodbye...Sector...V! (coughs up some blood, closes her eyes, and dies as it starts to rain)

 _(Numbuh 2, Numbuh 4, and Numbuh 5 all get up, saddened by the recent killing, and get angry looks on their faces as the turn to look over at Stewie...)_

Numbuh 5: Oh, that tears it! (points to Stewie) You, young man, are going to regret your sorry diapered ass for messing with the "Kids Next Door"!

Stewie (clocks machine gun): Oh yeah? You can't kill me, bitch!

Numbuh 2, Numbuh 4, and Numbuh 5 (in unison): Oh yeah?! Try us!

Numbuh 4: You'll never defeat us!

Numbuh 2: Yeah! We're "Sector V" and we stay strong!

Stewie (aims machine gun): Oh I will, you big bunch of stupid dicks!

Numbuh 2, Numbuh 4, and Numbuh 5 (in unison): Bring it on! (get in defensive stance)

 **FIGHT!**

Steiwe (fires machine gun): EAT LED, YOU LITTLE SHITS!

Numbuh 4 (dodges bullets): NEVER! (pulls out mixed condiment gun) You hungry!? Here. have some sauces! (fires condiment gun at Stewie)

Stewie (drops machine gun as he gets knocked over by condiment): What the deuce!? You got my clothes all messy!

Numbuh 5 (tackles Stewie to the ground and punches him in the face several times): TAKE THIS, YOU HOMICIDAL BABY!

Stewie (struggled to fight back, but to no avail): OW! OW! OW! OW! OW! STOP IT! OW! OW! OW! OW! OW! THAT HURTS, YOU BITCH! OW! OW! OW! OW! OW! OUCH!  
OUCH! STOP, PLEASE! I'M SORRY!

Numbuh 5: It's too late for that, you diapered piece of crap! (punches Stewie harder) This is the price for killing Numbuh 3!

Stewie: OH YEAH?! (pulls out razor-sharp dagger) Well, punch this then, BITCH! (stabs Numbuh 5 in eyeball with dagger)

Numbuh 5 (falls over backward in pain): OOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWW! (tries to pull knife out) MY LEFT EYE! OOOOOOWWWWWW!

Stewie (jumps on Numbuh 5's chest and forces the dagger knife down into her eyeball chamber, through her entire head, slicing part of her brain, and making it come out of the other end of her head): HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! DIE BITCH, DIIIIIIIIIIIIE! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! (blood spews all over the ground)

Numbuh 5 (as blood comes out of her mouth): You...little...homicidal...baby...you...must...burn...in...(gasps and chokes on her own blood)...Hell! (spits blood all over her clothes and dies, closing her eyes for the last time)

Numbuh 2 and Numbuh 4 (in unison): NUMBUH 5, NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Stewie (jumps off Numbuh 5 and pulls out katana): And you two dicks are next!

Numbuh 4 (pulls out melted chocolate sauce gun): Oh, no we're not! (fires gun at Stewie) I will not go down that easily!

Stewie (pulls out speargun): Oh, yes you will! (fires spear at Numbuh 4) DIE!

Numbuh 4 (dodges and runs backyards) HA! YOU MISSED! (keeps firing melted chocolate until the gun runs out) Uh oh, I'm all out of ammo!

Stewie (grins): Bravo, you little shit! (pulls out chainsaw) Want to get cut today?! (turns on chainsaw)

Numbuh 4 (trembles in fear): N-no! P-please, l-leave me alone and l-let me l-live! (runs out of cemetery with Numbuh 2) AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Stewie (stomps foot down): DICKS, GET BACK HERE! (gets on rocket-powered bike and chases after Numbuh 2 and Numbuh 4, all while holding out the running chainsaw) PREPARE TO DIE! GET BACK HERE AND ACCEPT YOUR DEATHS!

 _(Numbuh 2 and Numbuh 4 proceed to run down the empty street as Stewie chases after them...)_

Numbuh 2 (turns around as he runs and sees Stewie get closer and closer to them both) We got to do something , Numbuh 4! This homicidal baby is gaining on us!

Numbuh 4 (pulls out jet pack and straps it on): I got an idea! Numbuh 2, grab onto my back! We're going to fly! (starts engines)

Numbuh 2 (grabs onto Numbuh 4's back): Alright, I'm ready!

Numbuh 4 (makes jet pack fly in the air): HERE WE GO! HOLD ON TIGHT!

Stewie: YOU LITTLE SHITS! (raises fists in air, stops bike, and steps off it) OH, YOU MADE ME FUCKING PISSED OFF, NOW! (pulls out rocket launcher) TIME FOR A LANDING! (fires rocket at Numbuh 2 and Numbuh 4)

 _(The rocket flies up toward Numbuh 2 and Numbuh 4, hitting the jet pack, and causing it to explode. Numbuh 2 and Numbuh 4 then proceed to free fall towards the ground...)_

Numbuh 2 and Numbuh 2 (in unison): AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! (lands on the ground hard, but only with a few bad brusies and scrapes) OOOOOWWWW!

Stewie (pulls out shotgun): Today's menu speicals are LEAD IN 2 BODIES OF DEAD KIDS! (pulls trigger, firing a bullet at Numbuh 2)

Numbuh 4: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! (side-jumps in front of Numbuh 2, allowing the bullet to hit him in the stomach, killing him instantly)

 _(Numbuh 4 falls back on the street, with blood coming out of his stomach. He dies and closes his eyes for the very last time...)_

Numbuh 2 (gasps): NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! NUMBUH 4! (cries)

Stewie: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! (pulls out machete): Well, well, well, what do we have here? It appears to be a fat boy with an aviator's cap, ready to die a FUCKING PAINFUL DEATH! (runs toward Numbuh 2 with machete)

Numbuh 2 (gets on on his feet): NOT TODAY! (karate kicks the machete out of Numbuh 2's hand and tackles him to the floor) You won't take my life! (rolls down the slopped street, while hitting Stewie hard in the chest and face) it's YOU who will pay the price! (bites Stewie's left cheek hard)

Stewie: OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW! (claws Numbuh 2 in the face over his left eye, leaving long cuts and blood dripping due to his fingernails)

Numbuh 2 (let's go of Stewie as they both reach the bottom of the slopped road): AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWW! (falls over and covers cuts around left eye with right hand) You...you monster! You're nothing but a killer!

Stewie (gets up): Yes, indeed...(grabs chainsaw from behind him) Good thing I grabbed THIS before we rolled down that hill! (raises chainsaw and kicks Numbuh 2 over on his back) Now, it's time to die! (turns chainsaw on)

Numnbuh 2: No! Not that!

Stewie: Yes, fat boy, THAT! (begins slicing into Numbuh 2's stomach with chainsaw, causing blood, and random internal organs to spew and fly all over the place)

Numbuh 2 (in excruciating pain): AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH! AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH! (dies as his body is cut cleanly in half)

Stewie (turns off chainsaw): YES! I DID IT! THEY'RE ALL DEAD! (puts chainsaw away) Now, to head home. It's getting late. I wonder if Lois is making meatloaf for dinner again tonight...

 _(Stewie walks up slopped street, gets back onto his rocket-powered bike, starts it up, and drives off into the darkness of the approaching sunset...)_

 **KO!**

Boomstick: THAT WAS SO EPIC! I LOVED IT! I LOVED EVERY SINGLE MOMENT OF IT ALL!

Wiz: Well Boomstick, i got to hand it to you, I thought that was pretty epic, too.

Boomstick: Man, what a great day to end Season 2 of "Death Batttle" on a very high note!

Wiz: As you can see, both Stewie Griffin and Numbuh 2, Numbuh 3, Numbuh 4, and Numbuh 5 were evenly skilled in combat, but Stewie's intelligence and more advanced weapon article gave him the advanced and leg-up he needed in order to win.

Boomstick: And let's face, considering Stewie's weapon arsenal in his room, and his HUGE intelligence for a baby like him, its clear that the remaining kids of "Sector V" had NO chance of defeasting this homicidal baby.

Wiz: And sometimes, Numbuh 2, Numbuh 3, Numbuh 4, and Numbuh 5 can get overpowered by more advanced weaponry. This can allow an enemy to trap or even hurt them easily without much resistance.

Boomstick: Well, it seems that "Sector V" is no longer alive today. And this wraps up our second epic season of "Death Battle"!

Wiz: The winner is Stewie Griffin!

Boomstichk: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick, signing off, until Season 3 is ready for it's premiere!

Wiz: Well, goodbye everyone! We'll see you in Season 3 of "Death Battle"!

 **The end!**

 **H** **ORRAY! Stewie won the finale "Death Battle" of Season 2! This Season was a very epic one! In sone battles, Stewie fought even MORE than one villain! In Season 3, there will be more action, more violence, more blood, and MORE COOL OPPONENTS! Nothing can stop Stewie Griffin, and Season 3 will also be the FINAL SEASON of "Stewie Griffin Does Death Battles"! And these opponents that Stewie will face that will be much tougher and more evil than in the previous 2 seasons! Well, this is it. Season 2 is over! In the next page, you'll see a massive credits page. So for now, until then, goodbye everyone!**


	11. Death Battle Season 2 Credits

**Well everyone, Season 2 of "Death Battle" has officially come to a close. Yep, it's all over and it's time to say goodbye for a while. I hope you all enjoyed Season 2. This second season of this miniseries was full of action, blood, suspense, and even foul language. Stewie Griffin took the lives of even more opponents, who saldy lost to him every time. And in Season 2 coming up, im sad to say that none of those dead characters are coming back to life via ignored continuity. They'll stay dead throughout the miniseries and that's how it's going to be. I'm sorry about that, but that's just how it all goes. Some of these villains were even in groups of 2 to 5, and not just regular solo opponents.**

 **I'm very sorry to say that, but that's just how "Death Battle" works. Since Season 3 is underway, it won't be long before Stewie returns and takes on 10 more opponents and tries to win. I promise you all that Season 3 will have a lot MORE action, EVEN MORE foul language, CRAZIER opponents, and EVEN MORE violence than Season 1 or 2 did. And not to mention that Season 3 is the FINAL season of this "Death Battle" miniseries! But for now, let's begin our credits list. We'll start off by listing all of the main and minor characters used in this amazing second season...**

 **Main Characters:**

Wiz ("Death Battle" on "YouTube")

Boomstick ("Death Battle" on "YouTube")

Stewie Griffin ("Family Guy") (The winner of all 10 Death Battles)

Jessie ("Pokémon")

James ("Pokémon")

Meowth ("Pokémon")

Father ("Codename: Kids Next Door")

The Delightful Children From Down the Lane (also known as The DCFDTL for short) ("Codename: Kids Next Door")

Mordecai ("Regular Show")

Rigby ("Regular Show")

Le Quack ("Courage The Cowardly Dog")

Katz ("Courage The Cowardly Dog")

Professor Pippy Pee-Pee Diarrheastein Poopypants ("Captain Underpants") (books and film adaptation)

Boss Baby ("The Boss Baby")

Numbuh 2 ("Codename: Kids Next Door")

Numbuh 3 ("Codename: Kids Next Door")

Numbuh 4 ("Codename: Kids Next Door")

Numbuh 5 ("Codename: Kids Next Door")

 **Minor Characters:**

Brian Griffin ("Family Guy")

Meg Griffin ("Family Guy")

Ask Ketchum ("Pokemon")

Subway train driver ("Pokémon")

Japanese civilians ("Pokémon")

Random lady getting out of car ("Codename: Kids Next Door")

Random library visitors ("Codename: Kids Next Door")

Random High School Dancer Extras ("Grease: Live")

Random film director ("Grease: Live") (behind-the scenes of it)

Aaron Tveit (playing Danny Zuko in "Grease: Live") ("Grease: Live")

George Beard ("Captain Underpants") (books and film adaptation)

Melvin Sneedy ("Captain Underpants") (books and film adaptation)

Harold Hutchins ("Captain Underpants") (books and film adaptation)

Mr. Benjamin Krupp ("Captain Underpants") (books and film adaptation)

Ms. Ribble ("Captain Underpants") (books and film adaptation)

Random male hospital room service waiter ("Captain Underpants") (books and film adaptation)

Random male teen with stolen motorcycle ("Captain Underpants") (books and film adaptation)

Office worker on phone ("Captain Underpants") (books and film adaptation)

Random kids and parents at playground ("The Boss Baby")

All other needed extras (a mixture of all cartoons used in Season 2)

 **Now, let's go over the locations used in Season 1 of this miniseries. The locations are listed in the order that they appeared during Season 1 of this very epic and action-packed miniseries. Here's the list...**

 **Locations Used:**

Kanto Region ("Pokémon")

Tokyo, Japan ("Pokémon")

"Tokyo Tower" ("Pokémon")

Cleveland, Ohio (Codename: Kids Next Door")

Public Library (" Codename: Kids Next Door")

"The Park" ("Regular Show")

Random movie studio ("Regular Show")

Spooner Street ("Family Guy")

Griffin House ("Family Guy")

Local Forest ("Family Guy")

Piqua, Ohio ("Captain Underpants") (books and film adaptation)"

Random Hospital ("Captain Underpants") (books and film adaptation)

"Starbucks Coffee Shop" ("Captain Underpants") (books and film adaptation)

Random neighborhood ("Captain Underpants") (books and film adaptation)

"Jerome Horwitz Elementary School" ("Captain Underpants") (books and film adaptation)

City streets ("Family Guy")

All other locations (a mixture of locations from cartoons all used in Season 2)

 **And that's all I wanted to list when it comes to the characters and locations used in this miniseries. Now, here's the list of the "FanFiction" author' that I wanted to give a shout out to for reviewing some chapters of this amazing second season of "Stewie Griffin Does Death Battles"...  
**

2 great reviews from "Family Guy Fan-writer 15"

 **And those were the reviewers who posted reviews for my 2 seasons of my new action-packed miniseries. Yes, it's not as much as my other stories here on "FanFiction", but hey, it's better than nothing. And that's something I'm happy about. Now, I have some news about the upcoming Season 3 of "Stewie Griffin Does Death Battles".**

 **First of all, I already picked out the opponents for Stewie Griffin to fight, so sadly, I wont be taking any ideas for requests this time around, unless I PM any "FanFiction" authors for help. Second of all, YES, Stewie Griffin will lose a battle during Season 3, at the very end of the series. But until that happens, I will not be giving away who will be killing Stewie, and how Stewie Griffin even dies. And third of all, I'll be trying to make the battles a lot more longer and a lot more violent and gruesome than in these first 2 seasons. So, because of that, and due to my current college schedules/classes, it'll be much tougher than ever to find spare time to type up, and get these chapters/battles uploaded here on "FanFiction".**

 **With all of that being said, I will TRY my hardest to still write and upload stories here on "FanFiction" despite my current busy** **schedule. But if I don't please don't get impatient with me or get mad at me if I'm late with an upload or something. For now, I just wanted to thank all of you for finding time out of your day to sit down and read this action-packed and epic miniseries of mine. I put a lot of work into this second season, and I will soon be working on Season 3. So until that time comes around again, check out my other newest stories such as "Regular Show: The Great Birthday Vacation", and "Cartoon Network: Blast Off". They're very good stories and they'll keep you entertained until the next "Death Battle" miniseries season comes out. But for now, goodbye everyone! Thank you all for your reviews, views, and of course, you're support and motivation! You're all awesome!**


End file.
